April 2025

Tuesday, April 1, 2025

Meta Quest plus. All new free apps are betches. 

Breachers. Too much details to remember. Motion sickness. 

The Climb 2. Unclimbable. 

Dental Clinic. Mental clinic. 

Thief Simulator. Develop a skillset doing B and E's. Criminality. No thanks. 

Swarm. A swarm of motion sickness. 

The free apps UNESCO Germany and Parallax is better than any of those paid apps. 

I got Trainer VR for $10. 

Train building. Similar to Toy Trains VR. 

I might take the day off. It's raining. I didn't sleep tonight but yesterday afternoon I slept for three hours which can cause insomnia the same evening. My job is a volunteer job. Cleaning the streets. I plan to do this indefinitely. I'd like to see this area as much as possible look clean and free of excess weeds growing on sidewalks and around buildings. Cities in Europe and in Asia look clean particularly in the tourist areas. I can do my part. It's a rabbit hole. Impossible. My aim isn't to clean 100% but to at least make it look somewhat noticeably better than before. 

I sweep the grounds of the Courthouse regularly. No one else seems to do it. 

Today's train diorama. Work in progress.

I got Rollercoaster Hades Wrath and Rollercoaster 2 Thor's Hammer a deal. Get both for $8 Otherwise it's $4.99 plus $7.99. Reviews pretty much say it's as good as if not better than the other Roller coaster apps and there aren't many. Released on December 16, 2024 so it looks like I'm Johnny come lately to the party on this one. How did this slip past my radar? I didn't spend any other money today. 

I'll give it a try and let you know what I think. 

Hades Wrath. Next level. Over the top. 12 stars out of 10. Goes on and on. Lots of surprises. Not bad for $4. Rider mode only. No ahooter. No haptic feedback. $4 what do you expect? Cats on Broadway? 

Trainer VR is really good. I started a train diorama. Just started. 

Trainer VR

Pluses: Cheaper than Toy Trains VR. $9 VS $14. More variety of things. People, lampposts, etc etc. 

Minuses. Very plain background. Not cozy. Very industrial. Stark. No hills, ground elevation options or water like with Toy Trains. No climate light setting, day, cloudy, night, etc as with Toy Trains VR. 

I am really really trying to budget because if I scr*w up, then I won't have food and I'd die of starvation. 

I don't think that I'll ever visit any other countries again because travelling takes too much expense and effort. 

Coaster Mania looks good. However my bank account doesn't. I'm going to wait awhile. I won't get it for some time. 

Wednesday, April 2, 2025

Swept the grounds of the Courthouse. No less than 5 people said thank you to me. Thsts nice! 

I'm getting Coaster mania. The opportunity cost is a boel of wonton noodle soup or two Vietnamese spring rolls. I already have food. I have gyoza which I'm cooking with beer. The usual drill. Fry the gyoza, lid on. Then at whatever point, splash in some water or better, beer. I tried it with vodka one time. Cover the lid quickly. Fry and then steam. 

For dinner I have pesto linguine with chicken. 

I have also decided to get the Sweden Escape from World War 2 app. It has the old school vines like if I went in a time machine and went back there. Kinda depressing. World War 2, the European theatre. 

Eff it. I got End of Night. $3.91. There must have been occasions where I paid more than that in taxes and tips alone after a restaurant meal. $3.91 in this day and age isn't a lot of money. It's a 20 minute trip to old benighted days in Europe. 

The story is about a man who escapes from Sweden to Denmark during WW2. The movie Sisu did mention just offhand, that Sweden was under German military occupied during the Second World 2. 

I checked out this app. Bleak. Black and white. Arthouse Europe. While on the app, I got a call. There is no reason anyone should be calling me. The name who called me is J sin 269. I turned off the VR glasses and when back on, I put a block on this person. I did that before for another called called Ranveer. Scammer. I wonder if it was the Chinese landlord trying to get me to go in on the welfare overseas travel scam again as his name begins with J. I wonder if he uses VR goggles though. I once saw a store in Slovenia on the internet and for some reason I really thought that he might have been a part owner of that store. But I've never heard him speak Slovenian. Even if he did, I would have just thought it was Russian. 

This app is like Epic Roller Coaster VR meets Schindler List. Yikes is it ever bleak. So bleak that Charles Dickens Bleak House would seem like a Guardians of the Galaxy movie next to this old tin bucket. 

The next one is the majorly one. Coaster mania. 

As a child in the 70s, who didn't have the hot wheels tracks with the loop? And then run the hot wheels car down the ramp and through the loop? 

"It is nothing without the loop." The Simpsons 

Then many decades later, I got a Sony PSP video game where one can actually design a roller coaster. I got another Psp game where one can design an amusement park. 

Then I got VR goggles with the one free standard issue roller coaster app, Epic Roller Coasters. Just one of the roller coaster rides, let alone all of them, are better than every video game of Atari 2600, Intellivision and Coleco Vision put together. More fun. More intense. Especially the shooter mode. Which is definitely better than all the Atari 2600 games put together. 

This costs $14 and I'm psyching myself and bracing myself for the expense. $14 plus tax. Probably $16.50 or something like that. 

The beautiful part will be months later, still playing the app, totally forgetting about the day that I paid the money for it. In that way, it will feel like it's a free app. 

I got Coaster Mania. $12 instead of $14.

I saw the movie Primal Fear. There is indeed a twist ending but it's not the riveting earth shaking twist ending that everyone in YouTube comments said it was. A lot of hype. Essentially is it Mr Hyde pretending to be Dr Jekyll or is it Dr Jekyll pretending to be Mr Hyde? Watch the movie and find out. A completely legal eagle movie full of Courtroom scenes and lawyers. 

I discovered a VR app called Hell Horde. Absolutely amazing and its free. This app is better than 75% of paid apps. I discovered it on applabgameslist dot com

Profound. 

Moore's Law. Every 18 months, computers get twice as fast. I've onky had VR goggles for a year and it's already at the point where free apps are better than paid for apps of the past. Certainly with the tablet, Mad Bullets and Paper Train are each better than every Atari 2600 game of the 1980s put together. Some of those Atari games were about $30 new which was a lot of money back when minimum wage was $4 an hour. 

I got a refund on End of Night. $6 refund. 

I got Beverly Hills Cop $5. That was the movie of the year in 1994. To see it in the YouTube big screen. 

I also got Clockwork Orange. On sale. $8. Kubrick. On sale. This is the first time that I watched The Clockwork Orange while on probation remembering that through much of the movie, Alex de Large was on probation, that is until he got busted again. 

I was going to get Twilight Zone Steven Spielberg. But forget it. 

Twilight Zone is no longer in sale for $7. It was on sale for a week. I didn't get it. Usually it takes me less than five seconds to decide that I want a movie. Twilight Zone uh, uh. 

Hesitation. Good. Instead Clockwork Orange was on sale in its place. 

Twilight Zone. The stories were who cares? Not that great. 

Thursday, April 3, 2025

Worked at the Courthouse Grounds. A few people complimented me. 

I got two movies today. Splurged. Sinned. 

Ready Player One $8. VR world. I'm there. 

Tenet $10. I wrote my answers to the algorithm of time. The time travel objective experience and the linear subjective experience and how this is really a singularity. What we perceive as an eternity of linear time is a time dilation within a singularity that lasts less than a second. A terabytes of information downloaded in less than a second like purchasing a movie off YouTube. Purchase it and you can watch the movie immediately after purchasing. Immediate download of a movies worth of information, data. A really good quantum computer can download ten terabytes in one second. That would be a computer that's worth literally millions of dollars. One day neural link can download terabytes of  information to the brain in a second which would be a singularity within a time dilation. 

In the old days it took Limewire 48 hours to download a two hour movie. 

What we are experiencing as linear time is us parsing through the guts of the singularity. 

There is such thing as no linear time or time travel. There is only an illusory time dilation and any variations of linear time including time travel are a time dilation within a singularity. 

There is no such thing as linear time or time travel. There are only time dilations and singularities. 

If there is no such thing as linear time, what is it? Linear time is what appears as linear time. Even ghosts in the afterlife have a sensation of and hold a sentimentality to linear time. More about this in a few paragraphs. 

On a scale of one to ten, if a singularity or an extreme time constriction is a 1 or even a zero, and time dilation where one day seems like a thousand years for those who are in some kind of trauma experience this is a ten, then linear time or the present is a 5. Then what about time travel? Ha! It's all points in between 1 and 10 and not necessarily consecutively. 

Wait. That scale doesn't make complete sense. Either ten represents extreme dilation or the sensation of time slowing down or it represents the distsnt future if 1 represents the distant past and 5 represents the present. Which is it? Is it the former or the latter? Like all cosmic riddles, dilemmas, paradoxes, Zen koans etc, the answer is "Yes!" 

One cannot exist without the other. Singularities cannot exist without time dilations because TDs are what spawn singularities and they are what singularities contain within them. Time dilations can not exist without singularities otherwise how would they be known as time dilations? Time dilations compared to what? 

"Without the clouds, we have no idea of relative motion." The Aviator, Leonardo diCaprio

A singularity is an implosion of time and space, it is an extreme expression of time at one end of the spectrum. A time dilation is an explosion of time and space, and it is also an extreme expression of time and space at the other end of the spectrum. 

Time dilation. A singularity is therefore time constriction. Sort of like vasodilator and vasoconstrictor. Marijuana is a vasodilator. Cocaine and tobacco are vasoconstrictors. 

This terabytes of information in less than a second, singularity theory aditionally is able to mathematically incorporate the going backwards and forwards in time theory of Tenet. 

Like yin and yang, singularity, time and space dilation, explosion, implosion dance with one another to create balance. Eg. Without the singularity of gravity, we would, thanks to time and space dilation, float into outer space. 

"To see a world in a grain of sand 

And a heaven in a wild flower 

Hold infinity in the palm of your hand 

And eternity in an hour."

William Blake, Auguries of Innocence 

I hesitate to say this idea of mine. Ideas can not be copyrighted only the certain phrasing of the idea. Cover tunes are often better than the original. The Japanese long ago had reverse engineered the television and the radio and made better televisions and better radios. My idea is an unpolished diamond. Universities are free to use this idea, to refine it like a polished diamond, and to come up with something better particularly in an applicative way involving technology and degrees from MIT which I visited in virtual reality. Anyways the technical technology part would be beyond me. 

In the movie Passengers, the computer said, "This is the theoretical knowledge. The technology that uses this idea is proprietary technology."

This idea crosses different fields of knowledge. Science and spirituality. A download from the afterlife probably wouldn't wash as a scientific theory. 

Tenet and Inception are two of the most confusing movies in all of Hollywood history and I have them on YouTube cinema. 

Consistent with the theory of Tenet, I paid for the movie before getting it on YouTube. I got a prepaid credit card. 

Anachronism. Depends how you look at it. 

As China is the normalized* present, the West would seem to be a past anachronism and as the West is the hegemonized present, China would seem to be a futuristic anachronism. 

Way more futuristic and advanced in China. So many YouTube videos. 

*1979 Normalization Act 

I got some coffee from Ethiopia at Shoppers. It had a picture of a lion on it. The other ones had a picture of a toucan and another had a picture of a chameleon. The lion is the best animal. The other animals are all right. The coffee tastes pretty good. 

Jamaican blue mountain coffee is good. Very smooth, not bitter at all even without sugar. But it's pricey and hard to find. Overseas markets like Asia get the lions share. 

Jamaica blue mountain coffee can be reverse engineered. Get a sample of that strain. And find a place with similar growing conditions. Also try to get as many plants as possible Native to the region to grow along side. Also any fungi local to the region too. 

Maria. She was a sweet lady. I don't know exactly how it would have worked out between her implosove anorexia and her explosive overprotective parents with whom not even the Pope would have been good enough for her. 

Friday, April 4, 2025 

Trump tariffs. The stock market experienced its worst day since the start of the pandemic. What do the two things have in common? Trump in the Oval Office. 

Would that be a greatest common factor or a lowest common denominator? Depends on who you ask. 

Trump would want a 3rd term. If the States becomes Canada's 14th Province, then a Prime Minister or else Premier Trump can have three terms like Trudeau did. Trudeau completed a ten year term in Office which numerically, the tenth year would be well into a Third term of a US President. 

But you know what that would mean. Remember something called The Declaration of Independence 4th of July, 1776? That would be out the window. 

US, minimum 4 year terms, to maximum of two. 

Canada, as many terms as you can get, average record is 10 years for Pierre Trudeau, Jean Chretien, Stephen Harper, Justin Trudeau. They were each in there for more than 8 years at minimum which supercedes the time length of two American Presidential terms of Office. Or could last as short as about one year give or take a few months as in the case of Joe Clark, Kim Campbell, Paul Martin. No American President is there for only just one year. Some American Presidential terms of office were truncated so the requisite four years weren't completed as in the case of John F Kennedy and Richard Nixon for reasons I won't get into. 

I spoke with a nurse yesterday about the pain in my upper arm when I bend my hand backwards. I asked if it was the result of a magnesium deficiency. She said I needed it was tendonitis and I need a tensor bandage for my upper arm which is sold at drug stores. 

The nurse is from the Church I stopped going to. I wonder if it was a nudge to get me to go back there. I don't feel that anyone owes anyone else a lifelong friendship. 

When asked if I am going back to Church, my mind tends to drift off into thinking about Real VR Fishing. The prime fishing spots and the wonderful species that could be caught. Then my mind drifts back to the conversation at hand and I'm trying to think of the appropriate words. The non sequitor of thoughts between Real VR Fishing and thoughts of possibly going to Church again causes a temporary confusion and before I could come up with the appropriate words, the other person says, "Have a nice day." and leaves. Strange. That happens every time. It's that kind of town. 

I do think of going to Church again. The stained glass windows are very beautiful. 

That Church has strange politics. The previous Priest retired or quit. I asked him if he would attend as a regular person. He said no and said some reason which went in one ear and out the other. Why would that be? Strange energy. 

Churches are on the one hand, they will tell certain members, undesirables that it would be best if they were to worship elsewhere while with other lapsed members that they want to coopt into their cult, they'll try to nudge them to go back. They know that you know that they know that Church is boring. The local Churches have the most valid sermons. Pastor Joel Osteen is the real deal. Joyce Meyer is good as well. 

I  hear a Joel Osteen sermon and months later, still remember it. The local sermons are forgotten about the minute they're over. More generic liturgical platitudinous moral baiting and dogma. 

Over the last week, I saw a couple of women from places I used to go to regularly. I wondered if they were there to in some sneaky way, nudge me to go back. And they talk to me like yeah we're all buddy buddy. In my mind I couldn't stand them and don't care if I nver happen to see them ever again. In life when you got something better, never go back to something that isn't as good. 

The thing is, if they didn't go to some place for awhile, would I try to nudge them to go back? No. Why would they do that to me? Why? Because they're vapid airheads. Never ascribe to malice that which can be explained with incompetence as Napoleon once said. And undoubtedly for sure they do this to others too because people work in patterns. 

Joel Osteen has way better sermons. VR and electric skateboards is off the scale over the top fun while Church is boring and extraneous. All these flakey personalities which I have absolutely nothing in common with. No thanks. Hardly anyone is there anyways. Whenever I go there the place is mostly empty. 

I wish I was in China. The local Church is just some crackpot cracker backwater scene. 

The Chinese Church. I would visit. The Chinese are my people racially. But I would ask them, in this day and age, now that the dynamic has changed, why would you opt to stay in Canada when China is more rock show and is where your money gets you more and better. 

Be a majority in a futuristic rock show or be a racialized visible minority in some crackpot backwater. 

People who are Muslim. I've seen a lot of places in the Middle East. Way more futuristic than the West. Qatar. The SeaWorld in Dubai. In the West, Muslims are discriminated against. In the Middle East, Muslims are celebrated. In some strange bid at personal advancement, Muslims are living in Canada when they can be in a more futuristic place where they are a majority. 

More Chinese are living in China than outside of China. 

However more British people live outside of England than within. I wonder why. Could it be that England is on an island rather than on a mainland. A small town on an island is another level of backwater. England certainly isn't as futuristic or rockshow as China or the SeaWorld in the Middle East. 

The shopping malls in Asia are state of the art futuristic. The shipping malls here. They are whatever they are. This was even so back in the early 200s let alone now. 

I would advise anyone to not move to North America. Things are more futuristic where you are. Don't gamble on some crackpot notion that the sleepy West is better. It isn't. It really isn't. 

China is into building. All the politicians in their legislature are on the same page racially. China's politicians are into building. 

Canada's legislature is made up of all kinds of disparate races various and sundry. Instead of people who are into building, there are avaricious airhead politicians that sign free trade deals that allow for speculation. China didn't sign any free trade deals with their neighbours. Canada signs some free trade deal that benefits Americans more than Canada. Airhead. Or American moles in the Canadian government. 

End result, China looks how it looks now, a spectacular futuristic show and the West looks the same as it did thirty years ago except somewhat more run down. Case in point downtown Vancouver. Compare that with downtown Shenzhen or downtown Guangzhou. 

If everyone on Earth could be where they really truly in their heart of hearts wanted to be, at least half the people wouldn't be where they are now. 

I'm arguably better off in the afterlife with my friends nds in the afterlife. I can't stand the Chinese language. English is a way superior language. But the West is a backwater. In China I'd be one of the racial majority. There's no feeling like it. I felt that when I was in Thailand. Then its back to this sh*t. 

Forget about races. I don't know why I write crap mentioning this. I actually really don't care. It has been an issue at times but that's like milking a bad few minutes in one day not just all day but for a few years. The News would often mention the phrase White supremacy and for years on government forms were the words visible minority. That's why I wish I was in China all these years. Guangzhou city. 

I just write what's on my mind. Even if it's spurious thoughts I don't agree with. My brain under this dimension is what it is. In the afterlife, I'll have a better brain. 

I returned from Thailand in 2003. Futuristic shopping malls. Siam Paragon, MBK, Future Park. Then back to this. Then I saw on television a commercial, "So you have schizophrenia. Stay away from my family." 

That's what you can expect from the ice rink bathroom break Carl Malden backwater energy of Canada. Backwater countries that can't do anything for themselves blame their citizens. "You're not successful because you must have schizophrenia." Rather than you're not successful because you're in a country that can't win a Stanley Cup in over thirty years, in a sparsely populated country which doesn't have the manpower and human resources to build like China does. The country couldn't even offer themselves advancement. How could they off you advancement? So instead of offering you advancement, they offer you resentment. 

I might go to China and really like it there. But what if I go to the afterlife and like it even more? And I wouldn't have to worry about coming back because no one comes back from the afterlife. Ever. 

I've been thinking about getting Pickleball One VR. $20. I couldn't afford it. 

I thought of this while sweeping the grounds of the Court house. 

Then. Match Point Tennis from the same developer is free and I have that. I also got the free Demo version of Pickleball One. The Demo is good enough. Tennis is Beverly Hills. Pickleball is lower middle class. The ball is like if you too a croc shoe and made it into a hollow ball. The plastic pickle ball has a Swiss cheese look to it. 

People who play tennis live in stately mansions. 

People who play pickle ball live in townhouses. This fact did not dissuade me from getting the app. Best free app ever. 

Pickle ball is fun. Serve the ball only below the waist so you can forget about getting your kicks only waist up. Serve the ball only in a diagonal trajectory across the court. Diagon Alley, Harry Potter. 

Incidentally, I am awful at this. I wind up missing most shots. The vast majority of them. 

The demo is free for only 14 days. There is a song called Don't Tell Me It's Over. It's a funk instrumental. Can't find it anywhere else. The full version is $17 plus tax. $20. If I wait, I might be able to get a 30% discount. 

Bowling is better. 

The other day, a person was charged for throwing a small dog like a football. Did the dog do a perfect spiral? The dog was fine. What. Even after doing a perfect spiral? With VR football, if you use a certain technique, you can throw the ball in a perfect spiral. 

First train model I made on Trainer VR. Primitive. Rudimentary. 

This one is gone as I forgot to save. Make a new one.

Another one. Saved.

"Once more unto the breach, my friends, once more" Shakespeare

I got Star Trek Into Darkness $10. That movie is pivotal for any collection. The opening scene on the planet Nibiru. Better than the first one. The best Star Trek movie ever made in history. 

I also got Star Trek Beyond. On sale. These movies are essential. Spectacular. 

I don't fear the future any more. I just don't know what to think about it. One day I'll reach the point where I'll be optimistic. 

"Do me a personal favor. Be optimistic." Princess Leia 

Some aspects of the future for sure will be better than I imagined. That's been something throughout my life. I did things that I once never imagined ai would do. Good things, that is. Travel on a seaplane, a 747 jet plane, ride an elephant in Thailand, get an electric skateboard. Interesting times. 

I have to save money. I have an objective. To stay overnight at a hotel either in Vancouver or Victoria. The James Bay Inn. If I stay there, I wonder if I'll get a sign from Emily Carr. She is a genius artist. She has an inimitable touch. 

I have a print of her painting of a tree with red bark. 

If I had an interview with Emily Carr, I would ask her, "Emily Carr, why didn't you get married? I wish the best for you and I wish you had had a happier life when it comes to getting married. But don't sweat it. Millions of people are happier being single. For a million different reasons." 

Emily Carr thought marriage would take too much time away from her paintings. 

For some strange reason, women who were married weren't as successful. Married women had a lot more expectations back then. And there were no microwave ovens. Or even electric stoves. It took ten minutes sometimes just to light the kitchen pot bellied stove hot enough for cooking. 

Washing machines? Forget it. In Emily Carr's time clothes were all hand washed. 

Since women didn't get the right to vote in Canada until 1949 and Emily Carr died in 1945, it means that she never voted. That's how they treated women back then which is just awful. Awful. Some of the smartest people are women. What a waste of political talent to not have had women voting back then. What can you say? Those were also the times when people thought it was a good idea to have ten rats fighting a dog or ten dogs fighting a bear in a betting pit. Real bonkers times. 

I was thinking of visiting Sidney BC. I had a haunting memory but haunting memories can only last so long. I thought of visiting the gift shop and seeing sbitlut getting a World War One plane. German red triplane Red Baron. Or a Sopwith Camel which was the plane which shot down the Red Baron. Baron Von Richtoffen. A Sopwith camel has a tan canvas upper wing with a U shaped sun roof. Push propeller isn't that powerful compared to a regular propeller plane. 

These days, a person might be able to purchase a man sized or woman sized drone. Such drones can be like a flying car. These cars can only be flown in rural areas that are away from the cities. Hurricane model flying drone. $495,000. Pricey for sure. 

Saturday, April 5, 2025

I was thinking of going to Sidney BC. But I have two haunting memories of Sidney. 

On the day that Maria died, I was in Sidney. I didn't find this out until afterwards. 

The one time Heather visited me but after the visit I left to go to Sidney and had dinner there. I should have had dinner with Heather! That will haunt me for life. 

That's why I have haunting memories. 

When I go to Sidney, I come back with a very good vibe. That town has the most incredible vibes. 

The vibes are indescribable especially if it's only me who feels them. Some towns resonate with a heavenly vibe. 

I'll always miss Heather. Every day I think of her. 

My broken heart will never mend. Or it might. 

God is the God of restoration. These last few days, I'd think of something, anything and get automatic frissons of bliss, nostalgia, good vibes. Before it was all ever just only frissons of fear, depression and anxiety. This surprised me. Perhaps it was the wave that was created when I moved all those worms from their previous place of less than half an inch of dirt on the sidewalk to a huge lush dirt mound. For them that must been like moving to a five star hotel. That would have been good karma. 

I wonder if I'm going to have a broken heart for life. It feels like an ever persistent aching. Like as if my heart is like the Liberty Bell. Slightly cracked. 

I love Heather, if not more than life itself, I would say as much as life itself. I would give up all my tomorrows on Earth if I could be with Heather in the afterlife. I'd not only get to be with Heather, I'd get to experience the phsyics of that dimension. And to not have physical death at some time in the future hanging over my head anymore would be just exquisite. 

I had a strange dream last night. 

Bangkok Thailand. Day time. A construction workers area. I saw an old style fence formed of vertical wooden slats. There was no light spaces between the slats. On the street, there was a small food truck. It had a few items on a small hand written menu, written in many colors with a felt pen. Three drinks listed on top of one another. The bottom one on the list was Pina Colada. Price below, circled, $25. 

I thought that was pricey. I ordered one. 

I moved to my left besides the cart. There was an area, a table connected to the food truck. I was waiting for my order. The food truck vendor, a middle aged Thai man with a small mustache. He pointed. The order was prepared already. Ready already. That's the physics of the afterlife. I should have known. I was used to waiting as with the Earth dimension. 

There was a shallow open glass box which held orders. There were four glasses. I reached for one that looked like a champagne flute with champagne as there were two of them in that glass box plus one other drink. My order looked like a thin sundae fountain glass with what looked like red raspberry lassi in it. 

Then I noticed a small shallow glass bowl with a flat bottom. It held something that looked like a transparent creme brulee. As I picked it up to look at it, I noticed a young Thai lady standing beside me. I said something strange, "This looks like toffee-a from the mafia." Yeah, dreams are weird. 

Talk about life and unexpected surprises. I discovered Pinball Fx VR. I got it. $16. It has Indiana Jones. And the ark shows up as a special effect! That was unexpected. An hour ago as I write this, I didn't even know it existed. 

3 free tables. All the other tables cost. But all other tables are playable for free for three minutes each time. Then it stops and you can do it again. That's good enough. 

There's Xena Warrior Princess. 

Life is good to me. 

I am more than happy with this pinball app which surpasses all expectations. When I woke up this morning, I didn't know that I would know about the pinball app. This app is a honey sweet gift from God. Life can be worth living. 

This evening at 8:10 pm, I discovered pinball in mixed reality using the Kubrickian Dr Strangelove red phone. Imagine me having a pinball table in my own room. I'm thinking of getting Indiana Jones and The Twilight Zone. The others I don't know if I care Star Trek is good. 

I'll go to Sidney next time. 

On Coaster mania, I made a roller coaster with a very high and steep hill. I called it the Mega Kamikaze. Anyone can do this. When I rode this, I didn't get the vertigo that I expected that I would. Somewhat fail. Some VR apps are really good at generating vertigo. There is one where the user jumps up and down. Every time after a jump up, on the fall down, there is always that stomach sweltering vertigo feeling. That app is genius. 

My completed diorama.

My roller coaster called the Mega kamikaze. Coaster Mania VR. 

It looks like the stock market before and after the Trump tariffs. 

YOLO. I got Twilight Zone because that would be appropriate for Saturday night on Pinball FX VR $15. I also got Raiders of the Lost Ark because it's a favorite movie. 

I won't get Star Trek. I never watched a single episode of Star Trek the next generation that I can remember. The original was good. The JJ Abrams Star Trek is good. Next generation and the new woke Star Trek are sub par in my opinion. Won't be getting. Can't afford. Not a priority plus the theme song which is kinda cheesy plays over and over again. I don't know if I should tell this story but when CDs and CD players were new in 1988, I got on sale a compact disc of classical music and television and movie themes on sale. Because it was a new medium, anything that was kinda good would sound even better on a CD than on a scratchy record. Star Trek the next generation theme song was on and it sounded pretty good on CD. I won't get the pinball. I remember my impression when I first saw it. The first visceral split second that decides and I didn't feel it. I thought the table looks kind of cheesy. Tacky. I was severely underwhelmed if not mildly horrified. The table looks like a pre fully colored page ripped out of an old Star Trek coloring book. 

At the end of the Star Trek pinball experience, the Enterprise zips off quickly like every UFO I have ever seen in dreams. But it's the Enterprise which is one degree of separation. What next, a skateboard that just zips off into the distance? If it was a Close Encounters of the Third Kind or ET or the Day the Earth Stood Still 1950s version and the UFO zips off, I'd get it. The Enterprise? I don't know. Perhaps I'll get this later on this year if I ever have an extra $15 burning a hole in my pocket. Unlike a very rich person I can't afford to indiscriminately fling $15 here and there. I'm impoverished enough that an extra $15 purchase will have to wait until later this year. 

Indiana Jones. Twilight Zone. 1st tier. 

Star Trek The Next Generation. 2nd tier. 

Remaining ones, 3rd tier if not scratching the bottom of the barrel. 

Battle-star Galactica isn't the 70s one. It's the newer iteration. Indifference. Whatever. 

I was going to Sidney. The Complete Trip to Sidney would include 

Admission to the Aviation museum $22

Get something from the gift shop. $20

Eat at restaurant $35

Movie with popcorn and drink $20 

Something to eat, take away, $20.

Thats a $100 day! I was going to do that except for the movie. There aren't any movies I'd currently want to see. An $80 day. 

Forget the big screen and the high tech stereo system like cities such as Vancouver and Victoria has. The Sidney BC movie theatre has small screens like the Denman Theatre in Vancouver. What I am paying for is for two hours, to soak in the healing vibes of Sidney BC. When I get back to my apartment, I can sure feel it. The magical vibes of visiting another town. 

Instead I got the pinball games. The Sidney trip would have all been on debit. The pinball games were on credit which means payment can be deferred for weeks. 

Sunday, April 6, 2025

I'm not going to Sidney today. The weather is wretched, horrid. Pea soup. 

I'm thinking of getting the Star Trek pinball table. $15. 

For the love of Spock, get it! 

I'm not shopping for any more movies. And Star Trek should be the last VR purchase I make for quite awhile. Cross my fingers. 

Star Trek would cost about $15.50, with tax, rounded off. An East Indian take out dinner which I was planning to get at Sidney would have been about $23 with tops and taxes. And I already have food in the fridge as I went shopping two days ago. 

Star Trek would last forever. A dinner goes fast but one must eat and food that is good actually lifts the mood. Eating bland repetitive food can cause some kind of depression. 

One must eat to survive. One doesn't need to play Star Trek pinball to survive. 

I'm saving my money for a dream trip to Vancouver which includes a sea plane ride to downtown Vancouver, a one night stay at one of the less expensive rooms at the Pan Pacific Hotel which is a five star hotel visit a couple of museums, eat at a few restaurants and then return home on the boat visiting the dining lounge which costs extra to visit. 

Estimated price I have to save, $2,000. It will take me about a year to save that. 

I wonder about the wisdom of that. 

Getting a VR app for $15 which I would have indefinitely isn't a good idea but paying $500 a night in a hotel which is over fast anyways and if I bring my VR goggles, it's like I'm there but I'm also not there somehow for some reason is a good idea. 

I thought of visiting the Michelin star Chinese restaurant across the street from Vancouver City Hall. They serve a famous Peking duck for $200. Pricey for sure. Even a bowl of soup they serve there, I'm sure it's very good, is $35. That would only be an idea. Doing things that I'm not familiar with makes me nervous. Thsts a common thing with a lot of people. They seek familiarity and the comfort zone. The problem is that comfort zones tend to get smaller with time. One has to fight to enlarge their comfort zone. For world travellers, the entire planet is their comfort zone. 

Well,  11:40 am. I got the Star Trek pinball plus two space games for $1 each. Star Fist Squadron and Uni-Mo Space traveler. 

What the Spock, I got the Star Trek VR pinball app. $15. It's a cheap hit. 

Price plus Star Fist - promises unforgettable worlds

Price plus Uni Mo - unique delightful dazzling tabletop adventure. 

For one dollar. Not extravagant. 

Star Tek pinball I mixed reality looks awesome. The Enterprise. The Romulan ship, First guess was right. I don't know, with green lights that glow within. Major. 

There is a Star Trek VR app called Star Trek Bridge Crew. I saw videos of it. The whole thing looks rather @nal. On the bridge of the Enterprise the entire time. Nowhere else. There is a large window in which there is a view of colorful nebulas etc and there are some scenes where one is in space, fourth wall as an observer as the Enterprise flies across a planet. 

It was on sale for $14 from $35 which is quite the savings. Was. The sale is over. 

A reviewer who called themself something Police said that the game was bad. Do not get. I don't know if that's from the actual Police. Probably not. On that, I didn't get the app. There's no way I'm getting it for $35. 

Never mind country. What about planet? What if a Vulcan in Earth said, anywhere on this planet I'm a visible minority. If I went back to my planet I'd be one of the majority. Even if my planet had different races of Vulcans, we'd at least be all Vulcans in common. 

I'd be with my culture where we do the mating once in every seven years thing. 

Change planet with country. It's working with the same thing. 

Actually, it's no one's business and nobody needs to know about VR purchases and other people aren't posting them. Yes they are. And they do videos about it too. VR app reviews. 

I saw the Lemur Camper advertised on Global News. Cost $18,995 plus tax. One can get extra hitches and accessories like jumper cables etc for a few hundred dollars. 

There is a YouTube video on how to set it up and I was wondering if they were setting up the James Webb telescope. So many details. 

It looks nice but not at all protective against intruders. Thin walls no insulation so this would be more of a summer rather than an all weather. There is space enough for two full sized beds and a living room with lots of space to play VR apps like golf without worrying about hitting anything or any VR fails. 

For someone living at rent city, this tent would be like a five star hotel. 

The company is based in North Vancouver. It might decide to set up a government contract where it builds tents for spaces like Tiny Town in Victoria and the Lemur Camper would be a new standard for tent city living. 

Modular homes have more structural oomph and are protective against intruders. 

Also Canada and the States aren't saying it, but they kinda half @ss wanna be like China and the tariffs is to raise money for massive construction and homebuilding that homelessness will be a thing of the past. Homelessness will one day merely be seen as an early 21 st Century problem. A slight speedbump in the overall ongoing steamrolling development of planetary human civilization. 

Going traveling anywhere even to Sidney BC is to worry about money and food. 

I hate the physics of this dimension. In the other dimension one doesn't have to worry about money or food ever again. 

I used to say to Heather, "The good one goes to the lady." whenever. She always got the better portion. 

Now it seems that is still going on as she gets the good dimension and I'm still stuck here in the worries about money, worry about food dimension. The cortisol dimension. 

For the answers I've come up with I feel I deserve an early reprieve. Especially the theory of what we are experiencing is parsing through the data of what is actually a less than one second download. Blink on blink off. Not consecutive blinks but it's all the same OG blink on and one OG blink off over and over again. 

It's the cosmic heartbeat of the Universe. Diastolic, systolic. On, off. The Hindoos talk about this heart beat of the Universe often which they refer to as the in-breathing and the out-breathing of the Universe. . 

That same one pulse on and off again and again. Sleep, awaken, sleep, awaken. Work, rest, work, rest. This cosmic download takes place in a Planck second of time otherwise why would he have come up with that. It's the ultimate irreducible unit of time that is the basis of a download of, depending on the entity involved. For a person, its thousands of terabytes. For a Universe its trillion upon trillions of terabytes. All in that same Planck second of time. Linear time is an illusion albeit a very persistent one. 

"Movies run at 24 frames a second. The human eye sees 16 frames a second. It's called persistence of motion." The Fabelmans

Today's films on YouTube HD run at 60 frames a second! 

A femtocamera does an absolutely insane ten billion frames a second. 

Bodies and brains are the hardware. Memories and knowledge is the software. At one point, the hardware goes. But the software never dies. It forms the necessary basis or  preliminary for the next downloads being the life review and the afterlife existence. 

Simulation theory says that life is an animated movie. The frames are one Planck second. One Planck second on, one Planck second off and the pixels are one Planck length wide with one Plank length of empty space eachor perhaps quite a few Planck lengths in between each, the distance between protons and electrons relative to the size of the proton, the distance between planets relative to the size of a planet, the distance between solar systems, the distance between galaxies relative to the size of galaxies even galaxies discovered that are a few thousand times the size of the milky-way galaxy, in between but that's called dark energy because it also has energy. 96% of the Universe is dark energy and dark matter. Only 4% of the Universe is stars and planets. And planets and moons make up .0004% of the Universe. 

Sometimes the pixels rearrange themselves gradually and incrementally and sometimes these pixels all rearrange themselves suddenly at once. 

So parsing all the data within the download registers as linear time or sometimes time travel. Time travel. Turn a movie on the television. Fast forward and rewind at random points. That is a kind of time traveling. In the old days this could be demonstrated through reading a book starting and stopping back and forth throughout the book at random points. Again, just a theory. 

This algorithm would also enfold the notion of linear time and time travel as well as the double slit experiment as well as the Schroedinger's Cat thought experiment and as well reverse entropy aka currents of linear time that moves backwards as its a large enough theoretical algorithm using either the associative, distributive or commutative principles of mathematics to accommodate all of that. 

The proof is whether two halves of an electron are thirty miles apart or thirty light years apart, it makes the same amount of time to when one end is tweaked, the other end reacts the same way in less than a second. The small amount of time it takes between two ends of the electron being tweaked is the time signature that forms the basis of the time perimeter of the original download. 

But what about our bodies, egos, identities? More data in another greater level download. 

Bodies, egos and identities are data is a wrong subjective view anyways. 

Data includes bodies, identities and egos is the right and objective view. 

The Universe itself is also a less than one second download. The macro download. We in this Universe are the micro less than one second download. 

We are a micro algorithm resonating within a similar macro algorithm. 

We are a micro singularity within a macro singularity. 

Who comes up with answers like that? You sure wouldn't get answers like that at Church. 

Writing down one's thoughts is supposed to be therapeutic. 

I might add that this is just a theory. Who knows what the heck is really going on. 

People who have NDEs have a life review where they review every second of a life of decades and then return here a few minutes or few hours or few days later. Sounds like instant download to me. 

But who is responsible for the download? That would be God. It circles back to religion. Religion is truth. Any religion is good. 

"To you your religion. To me my religion." Islam 

"Trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding." The Bible 

It fells apart when the question is asked, if everything is a download, then is God also a download. Who downloaded God? It's an ouroboros. The snake that eats itself. God involuntarily downloaded Himself. 

Cosmic paradox oxymoron. Involuntarily is an involuntary act. Downloaded is a voluntary act. The essence of all things cosmic is a f**king paradox. The fusion of diametrically opposites, male and female, active and passive, voluntary and involuntary. 

"God is a verb." R Buckminster Fuller 

A joke: Jesus did DMT and said," I did DMT. I got so high that I saw myself." 

That's more or less what we're working with. 

Greater dimensions enshroud lesser dimensions in the same one second download time signature perimeter like a set of Russian nesting dolls. 

Every dimension is the same less than one second, Planck second download, its just that each successive dimension has a thousand times the data to account for the fifferent set of physics. 

The Earth dimension requires a certain amount of data for Earthly physics that are generally known about. The afterlife dimension comprises of a million times at least the amount of data to account for time travel, teleportation, telepathy, never experi ncing ohysical death ever again, living forever and also seeing over 100 different primary colors. That requires a lot of data space. 

The human body is the hardware. The information in the download is the software. One day hardware dies but software lives forever through being again downloaded or uploaded as the case may be, to somewhere else. 

Game of Thrones Legends match 3 on Android. For those who know it, at the Red Altar one can press a button and get a prize instantly. Then for another prize one has to sit through an entire 30 second ad. 

The get the prize instantly is a metaphor for instant download. 

The watch the ad is a metaphor for parsing through the data of the download. 

"Some people can read War and Peace and walk away thinking its a simple adventure story."

"Others can read the back of a chewing gum wrapper and unlock the mysteries of the Universe." 

Ready Player One

Egyptian pyramid. Egypt pinball mixed reality. 

The top, capstone, of the pyramid represents the Planck second download. 

The base of the pyramid represents parsing through the procedurally generated data creating a sensation of linear time. 

Procedurally generated. There are infinite light spectrums. We can only see one. The rainbow. Just offhand, a true rainbow is a circle not an arc. A few pictures of round rainbows are on the internet. 

There are infinite octaves of music. The human ear can detect only so many octaves. A dog can hear more so the data of their download includes more sensitive hearing. 

Even a mantis shrimp can see 16 primary colors while we can see only three. Secondary colors, tertiary colors, color wheels, shades, tints and hues don't count as different colors. But there are an infinite amount of primary colors so 16 out of an infinite ain't bad. 

"Two out of three ain't bad." Lionel Richie 

The different sets of physics between this non teleportational dimension and the afterlife teleportational dimension are just different sets or systems of procedural generations from not a master paradigm but THE master paradigm aka God. 

In University, theory of mathematics is also a course. That's how highly they regard the theory of mathematics. Even an untrained mathemician untrained in Leibniz calculus can come up with all kinds of new theories that are impressive and then merely interpreted into the language of calculus. It happens all the time. 

Star Fist Squadron. VR 

Great app. Best dollar I spent in a long time. I spent $1 on worse things but I can't remember what. 

Space warp was mind-blowing. Moore's Law. Computer games get better and better to the point where free apps are much much better than paid for apps of the past. 

Unforgettable views? It was just hovering in space some distance from planets of the solar system which might not be the worst place to be in the Universe but I'm not sure if that would be the best. 

Just like getting laid. That certainly wouldn't be the worst thing that could happen but I'm not sure if that would also the the best thing. There are possible dreadful consequences. Woman dies of childbirth. Or be on the hook for child support. 

Relationships have some connection to family. Get married, start a family, I meet her family, she meets my family except that my family is just about non existent. 

Family means coming from a solid family line that you can intellectually respect. My family? Not so much. 

Jesus said that you can only plant something where the soil is good. If it's bad, again, not so much. He didn't say it exactly like that. 

Talk about the Bible getting really weird. There is a story where Jesus tells a fig tree to die. What did that tree ever do to anyone? 

Therefore Heather is the last girlfriend that I will ever have. She was the last of the Mohicans. I think I'll be single for life. However there is the notion that whatever you think your future is going to look like, just forget it. There will be things beyond your imagination. 

Big problem. Scared. Even on the hidden list. Even after pressing uninstall and remove, it kept reinstalling. I checked out the developers website. It's a research university. I had to do a refund which I got. It would have taken nothing short of that. Then when Star Fist Squadron was on the hidden list, it registered as 14 on the list. Even after deleting it from hidden, it still reads that there are 14 apps when there are 13. 

It even placed something on the unknown sources folder which I had to delete. This app is criminal and should be reported to the cyber Police. 

Uni-Mo Star Trip VR. 

A one dollar wonder. 

Once I got the hang of it which took about a few minutes, it was good. 

It has a sort of Dig-Dug feel. The player moves a virtual joystick that remote guides a thing on the board which vacuums up circles on the floor and then brings these circles to the huge flower in the center while avoiding whatever else moving things, aliens, etc that are on the board. Worth the money. 

I visited Sidney today. In here. Me tapping the side of my VR goggles. 

My friend the junkie once said that he was going to get a mountain bike on cheque day. Cheque day arrived. "Did you get the mountain bike?" I asked. He said, "Yeah. In here."

I visited the sea side road. Then I went to the aviation museum all in a linear path. 

Then on the way back, I teleported. Instant download of a lot of data. I was in downtown Sidney BC again. I saw things that reminded me of Heather. "Oh Beebs, I'll always love you." 

There is an app called Bocce Time in VR. Bocce makes me think of the Old Country, the Old World and that's if you're Italian. 

Bocce was played in Vancouver in Grandview Park near The Drive, aka Little Italy which is Commercial Drive. 

Bocce is kind of like skittles played in British pubs and is kind of like croquet which is played on the lawn like lawn darts. 

More or less like the sport of curling. Closest to the center on average of three or four or however many. Knock out the other ones closest to the center. 

I don't know. I've never felt any overwhelming compulsion to play boccee. Have you? 

For S10 Canadian or else €6.41 Euros, a person can play Bocce in VR indefinitely. 

There are different scenes, different levels. Lots of variety. Alas, it doesn't have a Grandview Park in Vancouver level but I don't know about you but every time anyone thinks of Vancouver, they're thinking of bocce. Probably not. 

In the afterlife dimension, a person can read another person's mind and emotions and have a complete understanding. 

In this dimension, the other person's mind of course can't be read leading to misunderstanding or frustration at being unable to connect for example with a beautiful lady. And then there's that because of the physics of this dimension conflsting with whatever thoughts, you wouldn't want to read another person mind. 

The shadows knows are the words of an old radio show. 

"Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? The shadow knows." 

And women too. When it comes to strange lurid thoughts, women can give men a run for their money. 

Compared with the afterlife dimension, it is in this dimension that people are ghosts. They seem like 2D cardboard cut outs. 

That's why I often wish for an early reprieve. Not being 

Pastor Joel Osteen has a sermon called When God Doesn't Listen. God hears all. He doesn't listen to spurious thoughts and notions. 

"God answers every prayer. Sometimes the answer is no." Angels and Demons, movie 

A person can be a legend in this dimension. I suppose it would be good to be a legend in any dimension. 

I see beautiful ladies on the beach. A few smile at me. Difficult if not impossible to connect. I'm not a pick up guy which is a guy who goes to the beach or where ever too pick up girls. One has to have the gift of the gab. 

Women are astonishingly beautiful. Also possible trap, rabbit hole of imperiousness, worries about going to the next level or not. Marriage or not, eventually. 

The burning feeling of loving women but not being able to score is a miserable aspect of the physics of this dimension. Again, an early reprieve would be nice. However that's not as miserable as someone who feels nothing st all at any time. Emotionally dead. That would be worse. 

"Better to have loved and lost than to have never loved st all." Shakespeare 

"The truest friends are met in the trenches." Game of Thrones 

The physics of this dimension is the trenches. 

This would absolutely be the wrong time of year to get the Addams Family pinball table for $15. I'm waiting until Labour Day which is when the Halloween season starts. 

I hope that a Priest can say a prayer for me that I one day in the future meet a lady whom I am compatible with. How much donations does any person have to make for that? The next time I see a Priest, I will ask a Priest to say such a prayer for me. It's a casual prayer meaning that even if I meet her years from now, I can accept that. 

Adam met Eve. Chances are against it that they were born next to each other. What are they, a couple of mushrooms? Eve was the only one woman in the world. They had to walk quite some distance probably for years before finding one another. They might not have found one another at all given the distances involved. It would be like playing golf. But it was via the Hand of God that Adam met Eve on one fateful day. 

If Adam can meet a woman in a world where there was only one, then I can as well. 

However anthropological and genealogical evidence points against an Adam and Eve. There is Lucy the Ape but there were even earlier iterations of species that can be said to be responsible for the current human species genetic line. Adam and Eve? 

What the hell. I've been thinking of getting the three pack for $20. Pinball VR and mixed reality. Prorated, that's $6.66 per pinball table which is just the most evil pricing tier. Would you think I've sinned if I got it? 

I already got Star Trek today so that would have to be factored in the cost. $15.

If I went to Sidney, the cheapest most minimalist plan would involve either a $23 East Indian take out dinner or else rice wrapped in banana leaves Chinese style at the supermarket there and that's about $13 plus tax which is a good part of $20 and I already have food in the fridge now. 

Xena Warrior Princess. Never watched the show. Princess. Royalty. Not bad. 

Knight Rider. I'd prefer a European model like a BMW or Mercedes, Porsche, Ferrari, Lamborghini. An all black 80s style Camaro or Firebird seems kitschy and tacky. The strobing side to side red light on the grill seems ghastly and wretched. Like something devilish. 

Battle star G@y Rect@l-ca, I mean Galactica. With James Edward Olmos as the star ship commander. The cylons seem to have anorexia compared to the swole 70s style cylons. 

The problem with the Williams licensed pinball games available on Pinball FX VR is that the bumpers seem to be made of white porcelain fittings from washroom sink faucet handles from public urinals in the early 60s. And the gap between the bumpers is gargantuan like that in the pinball game Central Park which pinball fans would know of well. Small bumpers made of white bathroom porcelain with a thick rubber band around it and with the huge gap between the bumpers. 

The original Zen pinball tables have a more user friendly bumper structure. Big wide bumpers with a noticeably smaller gap in between. But these pinball tables are fictional. 

The Williams pinball tables which one has to pay money for are historical pinball tables and I got, for me, the apex pinball table beyond my imagination even last week. The Indiana Jones pinball table. Literally surpasses all expectations. Apex elite premium platinum Dom Perignon champagne grade experience. Using words like this can cheer a person up. 

The pinball table called Film Noir has a picture of Jack Nicholson in the movie Chinatown. I should see that movie. Problems. 

I tried seeing it before. Just couldn't get into it. Confusing. 

The director got charged for some kind of sexual assault and got exiled overseas somewhere in Europe. 

Joseph in the Bible was falsely charged of the most serious kind of sexual assault. 

And then the director made some kind of a devil movie. What a reputation. 

I'll read the story on wiki. Then see the movie. One day. Or not. Who cares? 

In the old days, one of my friends used to get beer on credit off of a bootlegger who is no longer in the land of the living. A considerable usurer's fee was charged if the beer was purchased on credit. My friend used to always say, "I can afford it." resulting in his already meager bank account being just eaten up. 

Alcohol can loosen something in the body turning constant anxiety and depression feelings into feelings of a faint glow of optimism but only if consumed in moderation. 

My friend used to drink. A lot. That's one way to do it I guess. 

Can I afford three pinball tables at $6.66 each. Answer: I don't know. 

I already have six pinball tables in virtual reality. There was the movie about the person with the one pinball table. 

Pinball: The Man Who Saved The Game

Six pinball tables in mixed reality is five more than anyone could hope for. 

I have a plan. I have two $5 bills in my wallet. If I go to the bank and deposit that into my bank account, it will offset the cost of the 3 for $22. 39 pinball tables plus I can find $2 in loose change and coins and bring that to the bank too totalling a savings of $12. Even then I'll have to mull this over for an additional few hours. 

A video of a Princess with a somewhat similar name as Xena showed up in YouTube recommendations and then a few Battlestar Galactica videos showed up. Is that a sign I should get the pinball tables? If I think yes then that would completely and utterly delusional. Delusional much? 

I should look out the window. Maybe I'll see a sign that I could and should get the OJ ball tables. Confirmation bias much? 

Now I put my foot down on FIFA world cup and The Addams Family. FIFA is really more for the summer. And AF is for Halloween. Now, Spring time is too early, wouldn't you say? The earliest I'll get them is the summer. $14 each but if purchased together, $20. So summer it will be. I'll get FIFA and The AF after July. 

I got the triptych of pinball games. 

I saw some signs. A group of three people together at two places. A group of three items, a paper bag, a white plastic bag and a plastic lid and a Police car with 3 numbers on top. There were 4 numbers but one number repeated twice, counting as three numbers. It was as if the Police were saying, "Ha ha. Go ahead, get the app!" So I got the app. Talk about complete delusional. I'm f*cked. 

Monday, April 7, 2028

I got Little Princess VR mixed reality app. $1. Absolutely amazing. Talk about free apps being better than paid apps of the past. Talk about a gift from the gods. Talk about bang per buck. 

Excellent. 

Smells can cheer a person up. In the old days, Victoria BC had the smell of tar and wood barrels and diesel fuel from the boats. Victoria is a Maritime town, The Royal BC Museum explorer shop used to have a strong smell of tar and wood barrels and diesel fuel. It doesn't have that anymore but it is low tech to bring something like that back. 

FIFA World Cup Soccer pinball looks pretty good in mixed reality. I haven't tried AF yet. 

I learned how to really work the mixed reality. I can have two virtual pinball tables in my room! Talk about a future that was previously beyond imagining. I figured out how to turn the pinball tables 90, 180, 270 degrees, whatever I want. The peripheral animations can be disabled. I never ever in my wildest dreams thought I'd have a pinball table in my room even if it's virtual reality. 

I played the pinball table El Dorado which was good but the premium champagne version of El Dorado is Indiana Jones. I never thought I'd ever play that pinball table in VR. 

I haven't tried Addams Family pinball yet. Yes, I bought the two pinball tables on sale at a special discount. So what. 

When I hadn't figured how to move the pinball tables I was worried. The mixed reality settings had been automatically reset. I wasn't able to place the tables where they were before. So I thought. I can now place them exactly where I want them to be. 

I'm scared of the Addams Family pinball. There are animations that include a guillotine and a haunted dolls head. That doll is a haunted doll. There's a museum in Quesnel BC Canada that has a haunted doll. Scary AF. I wouldn't go see it. 

Today at London Drugs, I got two bottles of purple dish washing detergents. Insane pricing tier in my favor. One costs $4.59 but two costs $5. Which do you think I opted for? Purple. Royal color. 

Trump's 25% tariffs on the World is the best way possible to encourage the World to commemorate the upcoming bidemicenticential demi tasse half glass, 250 years old. 

The United States is so major of a country that it covers National elections on CNN a full year before they happen. I'm surprised that they are not talking about the upcoming 250th. 

Time distortion cognitive bias. I'm 55 years old. I've alive for more than a fifth of United States history. A person who is 85 has been around for about a third of it. 

There is some strange numerological thing. Whether it's 25% tariffs or the 250 year National Anniversary, the number 25 appears. 

Irrelevant: the 25th letter of the alphabet is Y. The nasty Y chromosome. All American Presidents up to the 250th Anniversary have been male. 

Y is also spelt why. As in, "Why?". 

"Ask not why. Ask why not?" John F Kennedy 

Anagram: 

Susan = US NSA

Two days ago at Ogden Point, I saw two bushes of Scottish broom growing near the restaurant. Scotch broom is considered a weed. The branches which frow upwards resemble the bristles of an old style broom. I recognize those plants from the St Andrew golf course in VR. 

Scotch broom is a poisonous plant of eaten for humans and animals. It has some kind of bad compounds. 

It is up to the city to cut down weeds as they are potential fire hazards and Scottish broom is known for that. I try to remove weeds to make this parts of this city look nice. To do the entire thing is impossible and is a rabbit hole. 

The Addams Family Pinball was better than expected. On the main vertical face of the pinball machine, the warm orange lights made me think of Halloween with the pumpkins and autumn leaves and the smell of firewood burning through chimneys smelt around the neighbourhood. It gave me a really good burst of nostalgia. 

I haven't tried this at night. It's better at night. The animations can be opted out of. Otherwise there's the guillotine and that wretched dolls head. And a wooden crocodile. The crocodile was Egyptian mythology. Those who were judged sinners were eaten by a crocodile symbolizing a descent to hell. 

The music is better in hell and the drugs are better in hell. It's a paradise for a certain mentality as one gravitated to whatever energy zones that resonate with their personality in the afterlife. Mean surly people just like you and in conversations they can hold their own with you as you can hold your own with them in even the most surliest conversations imaginable. And even in turmoil, like coming down off coke and feeling just awful, some people just love that feeling, even in the midst of that turmoil, there is no longer the fear of death hanging over their head. They know that. But are otherwise very self absorbed, holding on to a grudge, looking for a lost item usually a missing friend or relative. They'd be happy in hell.

"Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven." John Milton, Paradise Lost 

I am happy with the purchase of this virtual reality pinball table. It's a good data download. 

Fantastic Mr Fox was on sale for $6. It was there on sale, on one cosmic level because I wrote what I did in the last few days about the cosmic download that is existence. 

The fox is an animal that means wisdom. 

I like to think out of the box. 

Psychics say it takes a year for a spirit in the afterlife to get enough experience to be able to send signs with more intensity and to visit in dreams more often. 

Why is that so if ghosts can time travel and thus operate under a different time dynamic? 

It's different and is the same. 

A illustration is there are two people each in a different train cabin on the same trip that takes a week. One person sits in a room with no television or internet. 

The other person in another room with a television and the internet is watching movies from all different eras in no particular chronological order. A movie from 2023, then a movie from 2008, then a movie from 2014, then a movie from 2025 then a movie from the 70s etc etc etc 

The train trip starts at midnight and ends at 3pm the next day, a trip of 15 hours. 

The passenger in the train cabin with all the movies has a watch set to a conventional am and pm time reference frame aka wrist watch. The passenger in the cabin without any of that has a watch set to the military time reference frame aka digital watch. 

So for the the person with the conventional watch the trip starts at 12:00 and ends at 3:00.

For the person with the military watch, the trip starts at 24:00 and ends at 15:00. Difference reference frames for linear time. 

There was a third man on the train. An old Chinese man who used the old system, the hour of the rooster, the hour of the rabbit etc. A totally different time system that wasn't ensnared with consecitutiveness of numbers. They used animals. They were on to something. 

"The train trip started during the hour of the rat and ended at the hour of the monkey."

"That sounds about right."

The Chinese, people of the dragon used a limbic R complex system of reckoning time which under the reptile under-brain is an organic form of time reckoning. 

The West, consecutive numbers is the mammalian brain way of reckoning time which under the mammalian over-brain is delineated as linear time. 

Beef and pork are mammal meats.

Chicken is 'reptile' meat. Wrong. Chickens are birds. Chickens are warm blooded and reptiles are not. 

Mammal - female: XX, male: XY. The shouldn't a pron movie be listed as XXXY instead of XXX? Straight pron, anyways. 

Reptile - female: ZW, male: ZZ

Telepathic thought tube emanating from forehead

1. Strong thoughts - mammalian over-brain

2. Slight thoughts - mammalian over-brain

3. Thoughts you want to keep hidden - mammalian over-brain and reptile under-brain

4. Subconscious thoughts not consciously aware of - reptile under-brain 

5. Emotions - reptile under-brain

This list is in descending order from newest part of the brain to oldest part of the brain. 

The reptile under-brain is the oldest part, but which part is the most powerful part? I think they are equal. 

The heart or the mind? The heart is the reptile brain. The mind is the mammal brain. 

There is another brain. The one that watches your thoughts aka the watcher. This is the third Brian, the spirit brain aka the Mind. The mammal and reptile brain will die one day. The spirit brain survives into the afterlife and it is this brain that has dreams. The reptile brain is good at symbol retention and memory and has certain base primeval motives like anger, fear etc which are completely based on the defective delinquent bonkers physics of this dimension and can therefore affect dreams at night. 

The afterlife has that as well. There is linear time but a different and unknown time reference frame is used as not only are there no military watches or conventional watches, there isn't even a 365 day year, or months or 12 hours because in the afterlife there isn't really a sun or a moon or an Earth. There is some kind of high ethereal astral plane except to them were the ethereal ones as they are much more alive than we are. And simultaneously on another hand there isn't. To us a ghost of someone who has been gone from us for ten years, to that ghost, that ghost has been gone to us for ten years. 

A ghost can time travel to all points in time even to the distant past and to the distant future But they might just visit for only a brief moment of time knowing when to hone in on the money shots of history like the precise moment the athlete made the record breaking score. 

"Time is a funny thing." Always, Steven Spielberg 

Patrick Swayze in the movie Ghost took time to learn. 

This is why some ghosts, you can just tell through their vibes that they died recently while others you can just tell died quite some time ago. 

Ghosts retain the sensation and sentimentality of linear time in the afterlife. 

Alexander Ovechkin bested Wyane Gretzky's record. An NHL player would have to play for at least 25 years to even reach Gretzky's record. Let alone to better it. 

A moment like that. 

Tuesday, April 8, 2025

Sadly, I looked in the mirror and there are all kinds of spots on my face. Blackheads, tiny moles, spots. Like my father was, I'm becoming another sarcomic leopard faced b*stard. 

Cosmetic laser surgery costs $250 a spot to remove and can even removed raised moles. How many freaking spots do I have now? I don't know if I can afford it. 

This happens to old celebrities who either it hasn't occurred to them to or else they opted out of laser cosmetic surgery. Celebrities even men wear a masking make up, primer coat, at least before going on screen. Women have additional make up applied. 

Great song:

Say Hello

Alexa Purple 

Wednesday, April 9, 2025 

God saw it fit to give my mother and to give Heather an early reprieve and they didn't want one. Even so, historically, there have been people who wanted an early reprieve and got one. 

For the answers I've come up with, and my mother and Heather sure didn't come up with those answers, I feel I am entitled to an early reprieve. Quick and painless. I wouldn't do myself in but to swoon and then literally die in a painless bliss that registers as a ride to heaven. 

In the science of negotiations, the answers I've come up with gives me what's called leverage, a bargaining chip. I've actually brought something to the table. 

Pastor Joel says that God always hears but doesn't listen. 

Now we're talking about the same God who denies me an early reprieve even though I've come up with valid answers that very few of any others have but for him it's all right to randomly fire off a volcano that kills thousands like Krakatoa or Vesuvius or thinks it's all right to unleash an asteroid killing trillions of dinsoaurs all at once. 

I sometimes think that God is an @sshole for not giving me an early reprieve. My life sucks. It's always sucked. I'm just not feeling it. That's a reason that makes me decide to not get the apps that I didn't get and wouldn't get. I've seen the trailer and just wasn't feeling it. Why not give me an early reprieve? I can see my friends who died young in the downtown eastside laughing. "Ha! You're still there? Our lives sucked but at least we were able to do something about it. The physics here are exquisite. No more earthly BS, that some people are left without.

" "Some are born to sweet delight while others are born to the endless night." William Blake, 

"In the afterlife, everyone gets more than a fair shake. We got the early reprieve that we wanted and we, ha, sure didn't come up with the answers that you have. I thought you'd be able to make your own arrangements. God helps those who help themselves. We got some h*roin and overdosed. We are the captains of our own ship."

No teleportation so I have to walk to places, no telepathy so it's impossible to meet women let alone to understand them. You call this freedom? You call this existence? You call this a download? 

In the afterlife, things are a lot cooler. Teleportation and complete telepathic and empathic understanding and no one gets ripped off. 

This dimension is an abberation, a deviance, a perversion of the optimal physics and optimal existence that can be found in the afterlife. Can you blame me for wanting an early reprieve? 

Gracia is a great free VR app. 3D displays. Food pron. 

Also dancing and boxing. 

I want to recommend this app. 

I thought of voting for Mark Carey's representative. I intellectually respect that Mark Carney was the Governor of the bank of Canada and the bank of UK. 

I don't have a dog in the local fight. Vote for the local NDP Mla because this neighborhood is an NDP stronghold. 

Over the last ten years under the NDP's watch, the streets have degenerated to a degree that is nothing short of profound. The downtown Eastside in Vancouver under the airhead NDP MLA and the MP's has degenerated to a profound degree. While China has gotten twice as successful and rockshow in the last 25 years, the downtown Eastside of Vancouver underwent a commensurate downgrade in other words, its been a real sh*tshow. Useless! Toothless! 

China is like Bedford Falls and Canada is like Potterville from the movie It's A Wonderful Life. 

Normal people with diligence genuinely trying to live a decent life generate a certain kind of energy and they get delinquent energy in return. Thanks to governmental mismanagement. 

I would also say that over the last tne years under the Trudeau Liberals watch, Canada has gotten more moth eaten and flybkown and more backwater. 

I'm probably going to vote for the Conservatives. 

"The Liberals have ruined Canada with their dangerous, deadly, and bizarre social experiment of decriminalizing hard drugs." Pierre Poilievre, Leader of the Conservatives 

The Liberal-NDP consortium that has run the downtown Eastside of Vancouver and  downtown Victoria over the last ten years has really, I mean really, sh*t the bed. 

"Ask yourself. Are you better off now than you were four years ago?" Ronald Reagan

Golf Plus VR has better physics. 

Golf 5 VR has better graphics. 

I'd rather play Golf Plus. Bad physics makes a game rakes three times longer than it should. Physics before graphics. 

Age before beauty. 

Two favorite golf courses on Golf Plus. 

Butler Park Pitch and Putt - in downtown Austin. Formerly the site of a clay mine. 

Two founders. One of which sadly, in 1952 got done in in the changing room of the golf course a few years after the golf course was founded. Police swarmed the park that day. 

The golf course is a favorite of all ages. No handicap requirements. 

Yale University golf course. The designers were TB McDonald and Seth Raynor. Whoever they were. They were probably great golfers. Ben Crenshaw recommends the golf course. 

Bring your Ben Hogans. Those are top name golf clubs. 

The course is designed to be a physical workout for University students with long courses over many steep and winding hills. 

I like University. The vibe. As for being an actual student, the poverty, the ADHD, and sheer laziness prevents me from studying at University. There is a Humanities 101 Course. 

It's free for residents of the downtown Eastside and held at UBC. That would be heavenly and rockshow if it's at the Point Grey campus. If its at UBC Robson Square, not so much. 

Humanities 101 is probably available at UBC Okanagan for any tent city residents in the Okanagan. Okanagan UBC isn't even at the level of UVIC let alone UBC. 

Humanities 101 is available at UVIC which is the second best University I ever visited. It's not at the level of UBC so I'm figuring if I'm not getting the best, I'm not messing with the rest. I would study Humanities 101 at UBC at the Point Grey campus or not at all. 

Does UBC have a golf course. Absolutely. Is it available in VR? No because Canada is too backwater of a country for any Canadian golf courses to be available in VR. 

There should be a Vancouver VR app and in ten years, 35 year old developers living in their parents basement can do a better app than professional store bought apps of today. 

A Vancouver golf VR app should include 

UBC golf course which is the Point Grey golf course 

Fraserview pitch and putt 

The in all probability extinct Rupert and 1st Avenue pitch and putt. Extinct. Converted into a condo or a mid grade shopping mall. Mid grade compared to shopping malls in Asia, empirically speaking. 

Whenever I play golf in VR, it's like playing golf during the worst days of the pandemic, at the start when a vaccine hadn't been available. It's like playing golf as a character in the movie The Night of the Comet. Unsettling but VR is at its infancy. 

VR is in the stage to VR what the equivalent of George Melies Journey to the Moon released in 1902, or else what Phantom of the Opera 1925 at best, is to motion pictures. 

VR will really get going in another ten years. 

So don't be surprised to be the only person on the golf course which is downright plastic. Not scary. Just a sterile anemic experience, like what a lot of people's sexual histories were like. "Speak for yourself!" 

Friday, April 11, 2025 

I imagine that since I wrote a lot of scientific things about the nature of time which I believe I have an advanced knowledge of, like in the movie Terminator 2, there are scientists behind double sided mirrors recording things I write. 

The train dioramas I did in Toy Trains VR, why look at the pictures when you can personally visit and have a look? Some hackers have that ability including those who work for the Police. Russian hackers could visit someone's train diorama in Toy Trains VR. Get ideas. Reverse engineer. 

I know that in sharing knowledge, some people who I just know I would hate if I met them are reading and benefitting from my knowledge. Casting pearls before swine. But there are a lot more people whom I just know I would like if I met them are also reading and benefitting from the knowledge. 

The google view counter says this blog only has 4 people who rewd this blog. There's probably a lot more. I'm getting ripped off on even view counts let alone money. My mother and Heather weren't ripped off like I am yet they got an early reprieve. The physics of this dimension have rip offs as a possibility. 

Publishing is a very dishonest business. I often think of quitting life. 

God hasn't given me an early reprieve. He might ask why and I would have the most excellent set of answers. I've figured it out. 

While others, he would ask why they want an early reprieve and they would say, "Uh," and God would say, "Granted!" 

I'll ask him that in the afterlife. "Why didn't you give me an early reprieve?" 

In golf, the afterlife is known as the 19th hole. 

I got a Spalding 1 driver golf club with a graphite shaft. $8.50.

Old fashioned golf clubs have a wooden shaft! 

On Golf plus, the practice mode let's a person play at a random golf course. Eventually they can play every golf course for free. Stipulations. Random golf course. You can't choose your own but can opt out until the one you want shows up. It can be awhile. And only 9 holes, never the full 18 holes. 

On Pinball FX2 VR one can play every pinball table free. 

Stipulations. 3 minute limit or 3 ball limit. Whatever happens first. Scores not eligible for credit. Just like dropping in to a University lecture. You can learn but you won't get any school credits for that. 

I've worked it out. To get involved with media, the arts, writing is to merge into a pool of mutual sharing and a lot of it for free. 

Every garden of souls has a gardener so these media websites like YouTube, Google, blogger have administrators who make money. But they make money off a lot of people. This money is generated towards taxes which maintains National infrastructure. These administrators are talented at making money and are talented at generating taxes for the government. 

Everyone has access to free media. One can purchase a book or borrow it at a library or purchase the book at a discount at a second hand bookstore. In the case of libraries and used bookstores the author receives no royalty. In the case of movies, there are thousands of free movies available on the Internet in sites such as YouTube, Tubi and fawesome. 

You get to watch a movie that took a hundred million dollars and quite a few months work from a few hundred people for free but even purchasing the movie at whatever is a bargain. 

So I did cartoons and got no money for it. Hopefully my cartoons inspired some people to get into the arts of some kind including as a tattoo artist instead of living a life of doing nothing at all to give back to society. I had fun doing the cartoons. I'd do cartoons with added zeal if I find a girlfriend again. Then I'd have a muse. Wind in my sails. Until then, I have to strive for a vision and some kind of a script. Kurosawa refused to do a movie without a good script. So would all other directors presumably. 

In as much as I can say, from this point on, I won't talk about getting an early reprieve ever again. Life is a blast. It's the negative things in life that give life flavor and variety. Overcoming something negative and emerging from the other end stronger than when you went in is better than living a sheltered life having overcoming nothing at all. 

There are people who are in dire but not dire wolf medical conditions and they still have the will to live. Anyone who does themself in no doubt has this thought occur to them. 

They think of the person who is a quadriplegic who still has the guts and decency to make a go of it because it is the existentially decent and noble thing to do. 

If you can't stay alive for yourself, stay alive for your government in whatever form it takes. Crown, Republic, Commonwealth, Protectorate, whatever. The government wants this and expects this of you. Do this to honour your government. 

As life is honored, government is honored. As government is honored, life is honored. 

All problems wither under the glare of good government. 

Nikola Tesla said to understand the Universe, one has to think in terms of energy, frequencies, and vibrations. 

The Universe has bits and bytes of intelligence and knowledge. Quantum bits of information. 

Therefore it isn't time and space that registers as data, subjectively speaking. 

It is data that registers as time and space, objectively speaking. If this wasn't so, time travel and teleportation wouldn't be possible even through watching a video and skipping to different points back and forth which is time travel or using a telephone which is teleportation. Data can be added to, scrambled and erased. 

Subjectively, its consciousness that registers as data. 

Objectively, it's data that registers as consciousness. 

Perhaps it's all a one second download in another paradigm. Consciousness is part of that download. Earthly consciousness ego. The spirit mind which is the deeper and truer mind apart from the earthly ego mind is itself also a download but from another overprogram. Overprogram, kind of like an overseer. 

Saturday, April 12, 2025 

TPC Sawgrass is a golf course in Florida famous for the 17th hole which is on an island reachable via a thin isthmus. The water surrounding that hole is notorious for alligators. One diver whose job it is to retrieve golf balls said the he was once bitten and another time an alligator bum rushed him and knocked his scuba visor off. 

The most incredible putting green moment was from Tiger Woods. He sank the ball on the putting green with the ball making the most pronounced 'S' motion I have ever seen. Is that skill or luck? Some golfers can read the inclines of a putting green like some chefs have a magic palate. They eat something and can identify all the ingredients. 

Tragically and most enragingly, a female Police Officer was set on fire in Vancouver. Someone with ten, count them, ten outstanding warrants doused the Officer with some accelerant fluid and then threw a match. There are a lot of citizens I'm sure who would like to go to the cell and give that suspect a good punch in the face. The Police would say, "Don't. We're handling this." 

Goofus and Gallant. 

Gallant donates to the Police charity and volunteers to sweep the grounds of the Courthouse clean to another level. A shining job. 

Goofus sets Police Officer on fire. 

Two days ago there was supposed to be an 8 hour internet outage starting at 10 pm. You can guess where this is going. I braced myself for an outage that never occurred st all. Vilnius, expectations VS reality. 

What I think happened was the basis of the upload being a tweak being ten terabytes of computer programming language preliminarily parsed pre-ready basis data was then uploaded from their end and then downloaded by all end user devices in about ten seconds. Give or take a coiple of seconds. There would have been an outage but it wouldn't have been perceptible. It makes about 30 seconds of outage until it registers on the modem and more importantly, on the television. 

The upload was so quick that it snuck past the 30 second prompt. 

I wonder about my faith in God. God would have me in a set up where I'm the only one in my family and extended family who didn't meet their mother. My mother died when I was really young. What a sh*t set up. And I'm supposed to still believe in God rather than just random bullsh*t forces? 

I'm not sure how much I believe in God. Maybe I do, maybe I don't. 

Over 99.9% of Chinese families remain in China. My father had these crackpot Christian siblings who thought that bringing him too over to Canada was a good idea gambling on some crackpot notion that the Christian West is supposedly better. 

My life would have been a lot better in a lot of ways had I never come to Canada. When I was growing up I would have been called many things in Hong Kong but certainly not a visible minority and certainly not by my government. 

In the 70s Maoists like the Pathet Lao were seen as backward and bad. 

Hong Kong is a complete Western protectorate allied with Western interests and there are local cliques who have a dog in the fight to maintain that quirky status quo. 

It used to be that Hong Kong was the flashy rock show one and China was the backwater. Now the shoe is on the other foot. 

Now Hong Kong is kinda second rate and backwater compared with China. China is the high tech futuristic rock show. It turns out the Maoists or Chinese became the futuristic advanced one while the Western protectorate is the backward backwater one. That's what you get for siding against the Maoists. 

Thirty years ago, these countries were referred to as Third World or emerging economies. Now they may as well be referred to as eclipsing economies. Look at China. Look at Dubai, Look at Qatar. Way way way way more advanced than the West. 

Immigration laws are to discourage the poor from moving to another country. 

The rich can not move. They'd create a power vacuum, they'd leave too many things behind, even entire estates. The poor can travel and let's face it, most people of they had a million dollars they'd move to another country. 

If you are unsuccessful its not who you are. It's where you are. Different temperaments resonate more with certain places and less with others. Not all places are equal. Depends what you want. Things which you want which are so rare where you are. These things are plentiful in another country. 

A lot of poor have skills. They can speak multiple languages and a lot have a skill set. 

If they had a million, a lot would leave and never come back. It's more fun to be an expat. 

"Why don't you return to the town in which you once lived?" Because I learned it from you. 

Anyway, 75% of residents in any town are from elsewhere and never went back. 75% of statistics are false anyways. 

The reciprocal economies where food is cheap, a meal at a restaurant is $1 Canadian have cheap wages but the price of plane travel is consistent making it difficult for the poor to travel and the other economy where wages are high but so are food prices so that same meal would cost about $30 in Canada including taxes and tips again makes it difficult for the poor to travel. 

It's a crooked table slanted against the poor, part and parcel of the much hated much loathed physics of this dimension. 

What a sh*tbag dimension with hits sh*tbag physics. Worry about money all the God damned time. I asked God to give me an early reprieve. He saw it fit to waste my mother and to waste Heather. At least he could have been considerate enough to take me along as well. As you see, I don't really want to be here expecially when I've come up with the answers that I have. I figured it out. My answers entitle me to an early reprieve from God. 

I want to walk out of life like walking out of some sh*tty job. 

Let's make the distinction. I'm not asking for an early reprieve here. What I'm merely saying is that is a plan B that God could have resorted to but didn't. All I'm saying is that things would have been better for all involved most of all me had I gotten an early reprieve years ago. Again, not asking for an early reprieve. 

There are a lot of flakes and squares that you can't unmeet once you meet them. Especially at Church. Ugh. *shudder. 

Extraneous personalities with whom I have less and less in common with as time goes on. Why bother? I owe them nothing and they owe me nothing. No one owes anyone a lifelong friendship. 

It's literally a hundred times easier to not go to Church than to go to Church. I don't see how I'd go ever again. 

If the premise is that they want you to go to Church again, they won't beat you up. How could you go to Church while nursing injuries? How could one go to Church when they are in traction? 

They won't get you arrested and charged for not going to Church or else in order to get you to go back to Church. If one is charged, they are at the Police station holding cells, in the Courthouse, at the probation office, at the prison. In no case are they in that Church again. 

Any Church can get the Police to prevent a person from going to Church. However no Police will enforce a person going to Church if they don't want to go. 

If that were to happen, the situation would be so irreparably compromised that it would end any chances of going to that Church again for life. 

When I see people from that Church in the street, I tell them that I often think of going there again. But that's all it is. A thought. That Church has some nice stained glass windows. That's about it. 

Knowing what I know about life, had my mother lived, had I stayed in Hong Kong, my life would have been unimaginably awful in some way that it otherwise wasn't. That's Murphy's Law. What can go wrong will go wrong. The grass is never greener on the other side. Every country is the wrong country. Every country is only ever one set of advantages and disadvantages VS that of another country. 

China. It helps to know that language and well. China is more traditional so money and class are more emphasized. Otherwise, lots of energy, money, and traving is alway a hassle. 

I don't even want to travel to Sidney BC. In fact, I strongly object to the idea due to my haunting memories and the residual PTSD that always always accompanies that. And Sidney BC is 55 miles away. China is what. A few thousand miles away? Forget about it. 

Even the thought of traveling to Sidney BC gives me quite a blast of anxiety. My amygdala is on fire. What were the chances of that? 

It's better for me to be single. 

Over the decades I heard some stories about women with broken glass or razor blades in their verginas. I've never heard any stories of men judiciously coating their member with cubes of shatter glass or with a layer of rough 50 grade sandpaper before sliding it in. 

Women are just nasty. 

"The female of the species is deadlier than the male." Rudyard Kipling 

I fear the future. Not a palpable fear but an intellectual fear. If there is God, is there? I have to trust that there is. There is a God but often God works in ways that no human mind can understand. 

I look to the future and all I see is fear. 

"I can see you know nothing of wizards. They are like winter thunder on a wild wind  rolling in from a distance, breaking hard in alarm. But sometimes a storm is just a storm." Thranduil, The Hobbit 

Paintings in the mind of the future are like winter thunders, wild rolling winds etc. But sometimes all they are is just that. Just a picture of a disaster and not an actual disaster.

Perhaps the future is like

Vilnius, Expectations VS Reality. 

I played TPC Sawgrass today on Golf Plus. The back 9 to get to the infamous 17th hole which is not what I would refer to my 17th girlfriend as. 

I didn't see any alligators. I saw one last time. This app is so ingenius that different alligators appear or not in all kinds of different places. 

Sigh. I regressed and got back om the monthly subscription which includes Pebble Beach which is the number 1 golf course in the USA. 

Sweetens Cove, Butler Park is not prestigious. Common. Farthing hotdogs. 

Pebble Beach is a rich man's country club. So is St Andrews in Scotland. Jumeirah Estates is also very prestigious. Jumeirah and Scottsdale golf courses have Rolex advertisements. You sure don't see that at Butler Park. What you do see at Butler Park is Bill Murray from Cadsyshack, Gunga Galunga. 

The Butler Park murder turned out to be more murky that imaginable. What happened was a man went into the clubhouse which had a general store of some kind. The man asked for a pack of cigarettes which cost forty cents at the time. But then wages were fifty cents an hour at the time. The man produced a dollar. One of the two founders was working at the store. As the co founder was looking for change from the cash register, he got shot. He ran out. Shot a few more times to remove all doubt. The man ran out running past another person who was there at the time. The man wasn't interested at all in the other guy. 

"He obviously wasn't interested in your skinny @ss otherwise you'd be dead too." Beverly Hills Cop

The co founder had incriminating information about nine other than then Senator LBJ. As the man drove away in a car, some golfers who were there had score cards. The one the man ran past shouted to the golfers to write down the license plate and to make a not of the car make and model. The golfers got every license plate letter and number except one. The Police were still able to use that to make an arrest. 

The man never talked. But for a poor man, he had some high priced lawyers. Not your $50,000 a year public defenders. These were the majorly private sector lawyers. Very expensive. The man got five years probation. 

Theories are that LBJ ordered the hit. Well, someone else connected to later Vice President then President LBJ got shot but I can't remember exactly who. 

The World record for fastest download was set in Japan at about 50.25 terabytes per second! Is that a download or a singularity? Or a mini singularity? All black holes are singularities. It's a fact that some black holes are larger than others. 

"640 kb ought to be enough for anybody." Commodore 64

50.25 Tb is a few lifetimes worth of memory objectively, memories subjectively. 

How many movies is a quarter of that? A quarter of that is about 13 Tb of memory. It used to be 2.5 Gb of memory per movie. But computer programming parses down and compresses so that movie could be stored with a fraction of the memory. That's like a lifetime, hundreds of movies. As for audio let alone novels and printed text? Forget about it! 

Semiconductor chips either get smaller all the time or else they profess more memory in that amount of space. 

A 5 Mb computer chip being loaded onto a plane in 1956. 

5 Mb is 5,000 letters of printed text enough for a 5,000 letter essay. 

Today, that computer chip would be large enough after being hollowed out into a storage unit, to store a 50" 4K TV, VR goggles, a laptop computer, two ten inch tablets and a Sony PSP with plenty of space left over. Even then, all those things put together even with the 5 Mb from 1956 anachronistically thrown in for the sake of argument, that still wouldn't be one terabyte. So 50 Tb downloaded in one second is a whopping lot. 

Sunday, April 13, 2025

I got some coincidences. Signs that I'm on the right track. Or else it's just more confirmation bias. 

I watched some of a couple of movies yesterday. Not even the entire movie. Just at a random point where I last left off. 

The movie Ready Player One mentions a singularity. 

"I strayed out of thought and time. The stars wheeled overhead. And every day was as long as a life age on the Earth. But it was not the end. I felt life in me again." Gandalf, The Two Towers 

Life review, NDE, gone for what seemed like forever on their end but on this end they were gone for only two minutes. Singularity. 

Nurse: "You flatlined for two minutes. We get that all the time." 

News. 

Russians attack Ukrainian city of Sumi. What can I say about a town that I'm nearly 55 years old and this is the first time I heard of that town. Towns like Las Vegas, Paris, London, Tokyo, New York I heard of before I was ten years old. 

Isn't Sumi or Suomi what Finnish people refer to the Finnish language as? The Kalevala is an epic Finnish poem that Tolkien derived inspiration from for Lord of the Rings. 

The Pope addresses parishioners st the Vatican without the aid of an oxygen respirator. Which underscores that such an endeavour would be an accomplishment for anyone given this age of social anxiety and PTSD. 

Vancouver Canucks hockey player Derek Forbort got an orbital bone fracture resulting from a melee on the ice rink from Minnesota Wild Yakov Trenin. 

Will there be criminal charges? 

Todd Bertuzzi attacked Steve Moore and there were charges resulting from that. 

Forbort is now gone for the season. The orbital bone is what frames the eye socket on the face. That would've been painful. 

Fiction: 

"I accept any challenges that come my way. Like politicians of old, I've accepted challenges to many duels and I've survived every one of them. So if any voting constituents think that they have what it takes, write me a letter at the Parliament Buildings. These letters would then be forwarded to the Police Department and the Police Officers in charge of this file would go through the pile of letters and through some Byzantine selection process, they would cherry pick and then place on a shortlist those whom I would be most likely to survive. But I am worried as there is always a chance that something could go wrong however remote even with Police vetting." 

Monday, April 14, 2025

Today, I got Tyrion Lannister, Game of Thrones Legends match 3. 

Rick: "Everything around here has changed."

Daryl:  "The thing is, it was you who changed it."

The Walking Dead 

Medium Nicole this week talks about, in her words, "the F* you moments, the Mike drops from spirit." That says it all. She mentions a download. Mike drops. The angel Michael or Mike. I'm keeping score. 

Mike drop. Drop purple Mike acid. Purple microdot. No, don't do it. 

A few days ago someone important connected to a book store said hello to me. 

60 Minutes. Banana Baseball:  "They're geniuses. They cracked the code." 

I have YouTube on autoplay. One of the videos that showed up had a picture of Einstein on the thumbnail, 'Rare Genius Deals'. 

I once had a dream of Einstein. He was wearing a dark blue Irish style sweater and he was sitting in a bamboo peacock chair. He was in the living room of a house I had once lived at decades ago. He was facing West, the back of the chair against a wall of the living room. There was no other furniture in the room. Sunlight streaming in through the large living room window. No curtains on window. 

Wednesday, April 16, 2025 

This week is Easter. 

When Jesus was brought before the high Priest Caiphas, Jesus was asked who he thought he was. Jesus said something along the lines of, "I am the Son of God. I will come from Heaven seated at the Right Hand of the Father."

Caiphas was so angry, he tore his own shirt. 

He was angry because he felt that Jesus appropriated words directly from Daniel 7:13 "I am the Son of God and I will come from Heaven seated st the Right Hand of the Father."*

*source: Tracing the locations of the last 24 hours of Jesus. YouTube 

Wall Town Wonders is one of the best mixed reality games. 

World building. Beautiful graphics. Sizzles in profundity. 

Mesmerizing. 

Wall Town Wonders has a free Christmas level. 

I might have to rearrange the framed pictures on my wall to make room for WTW. This game really impresses me. 

I had to restart from scratch as once some of the buildings are placed, it can't be moved. I placed a farm somewhere that I didn't want. I had the option to move the Town Hall. Then I wanted to move my farm where the Town Hall was and couldn't. So start from scratch. This game is everything that Demeo and Witchblood tries to be. 

The only other mixed reality games I really like are 

Pinball Fx VR. 

Hell Horde. 

"With your birth comes a solemn vow. You will have nothing. Your orivelege is the dirt." Star Wars, Knights of the Old Republic 

I think that God has forsaken me. He took away my mother but then that also means I never grieved for her. Sadhguru said that the bond that a person has with another is called the runabunda. The more intense and closer the runabunda is, the more intense the grief. A person can die from grief in the first 30 days after a loved ones death. 

Donald Trump mentioned something about inversely proportional. That brings to mind the topic of proportionality. The intensity of grief is directly proportional to the amount of time spent with the other person. 

Grief still hits me with a searing haunting spirit. My heart aches and it feels that a razor blade is being slowly sliced along the side of my heart. 

"How can you mend a broken heart? 

How can a closer ever win? 

So help me mend my broken heart. 

So I can live again."

The Bee Gees

Anyways, I fear that I will be single for life. But my brain paints pictures. Sometimes it's just a picture and that's all it is. I've learned that now. 

I once thought that Heather would be alive for another 20 years. 

I once thought I'd get coronavirus during the pandemic and die. 

Yesterday I misplaced my VR paddle. I thought it rolled under the bed. I pulled my bed aside and used a flashlight. Ten minutes later, I found it some place else in the room. 

Talk about the brain painting a picture. 

Before a tsunami, there is a lot less water than usual. If one sees a ride rolling out a lot, that's a warning. Then there is a lot of water. In life, sometimes for awhile, there is a lot less than usual before there is a lot more than usual. When it rains it pours. 

Wall Town Wonders revolves around mini games. 

The fishing one I got a hang of. The firefighting World War One airplane is delightful and In mixed reality as well. The diving board is as difficult as anything. Nearly impossible if not absolutely impossible. 

I am absolutely crestfallen and in commiseration that I haven't been able to attain the Christmas update. Supposedly everyone who downloads this after the December 2024 update gets the Christmas level. This is a monumental letdown of Olympian proportions. 

This app definitely has a Pavlov's dog aspect which I like. 

Pavlov's dog plus saved progress. World War One Airplane has all kinds of upgrades. But the mission must be complete or start all over again. No saved progress. For eg. Mission. Shoot down 12 enemy airplane. Shoot down 7 and get struck down. No credit for 7 enemies taken out. Start all over again. 

When it comes to being an @ss hole, life always always finds a way. I fenerste the energy of diligence and at just about every turn, I get delinquency in return. 

I complete work sweeping the grounds of the Courthouse and I see a delinquent yelling. The typical miscreant forces of life. That's why I often want to quit life. 

There is that story about focusing on the small imperfect dot on otherwise vastly mostly perfectly fine piece of paper. 

For every delinquent there are literally thousands of people who don't obviously appear to be delinquents. That's the actual ratio. 

I generate thoughtfulness and get thoughtlessness in return. For years Ive lived with a neighbour who likes to feed pigeons. He let's them into his room. There is a video on YouTube about someone arguing with a food truck vendor outside of London Drugs who was feeding pigeons. The guy said,  "It's a $300 fine. I can literally call the cops on you."

For literally years, day in, day out, every morning I wake up to the smell of foetid pungent bird urine. The guy lies often. He is like a lot of people I met in my lifetime. Chronic liars. Lied even when there was no good reason to. 

Mendacious, prevaricating, lying personality. 

I don't feed birds so naturally in return, the damned forces of life dispatches my way someone who feeds birds. 

I've come up with the answers too. Life and its much hated set of physics is a defective download, a broken platform. For some reason I don't get an early reprieve. I have to endure the contemptible insufferable physics of this dimension. Including massive delinquency. My neighbour is a sleazy scuzzy guy. He has the mind of a 14 year old. 

Inconsiderate. Liar. Gas lighter. 

The guy is Polish. You can't write Polish without writing the word LI, in other words, lie. 

I should ask him, Dlaczego zawsze klamiesz? Which means why are you always lying? 

The Poles had to always lie to avoid the World War 2 authorities of the time. My neighbour would have been too young for that but his parents certainly wouldn't have been. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree in this case. 

He came from a generation where it was common to tell adults one thing and children another. And every f*cking chance they could get. 

That's why I hate the human species. I really hate the human species. I wish I had an early reprieve. I should have been a Satanist. I could have died earlier and been spared the existentially counterproductive physics of this dimension. 

Satanism teaches that a good death is better than a bad life rather than vice versa. 

Satanism teaches that the value of life is finite because it is finite and not infinite based on some false tautilogial and teleologjcal poetic reasoning. 

Satanism teaches conditional love. 

Constant perpetual unending delinquency. Feeding birds. Birdman of Alcatraz. 

He's been feeding birds for years and my landlord is completely retarded about the whole thing. It's not like my landlord has to deal with this so to him it's just some weird irrelevant abstract BS. What a flake. I don't really respect that guy. 

One day I'll move to another place or he'll move to another place. 

Thats the Murphy's Law delinquent sleazy aspect of the much loathed forces of life. Generate honesty and all the sh*t bonkers forces of life ever sends your way is inveterate liars. To hell with them. The devil to them. Like Trump said, "Toxic and won't be missed." 

"Liar and won't be missed." 

Thai: krung Su tai. The last time. 

"Suk wun ning, pom gor jer khun krung su tai." One day I'll see you for the last time. 

One day I'll see that insonsiderate pola*k delinquent pigeon feeder for the last time. 

Sadhguru did say in a video years ago that you never know when you are going to see someone for the last time. In the case of a future faking gaslighting delinquent narcissist, that would be a great occasion indeed. I wouldn't be sorry to hear that one had gone. 

There's a few Hollywood actors. I won't name them but I wouldn't be sorry to see them gone. Often I feel some sadness to hear that a famous celebrity had gone. But some celebrities were jerks on screen. I'm sure they were reading from a script, but my subconscious picked up something that tells me that they are not acting. I usually stand for a moment of silence when someone famous goes. These certain celebrities, I won't stand for a moment of silence when they go. 

Oh well. People come and go just as suddenly. You leave them where you find them. 

There's another joker in my hotel. The bird feeding neighbour has the mind of a 14 year old. This other neighbour has the mind of an 8 year old. His smoke alarm keeps going off. Really really bizarre when you realize that this is the guy who always goes out of his way to leave the bathroom window wide open even in minus seven degree weather. You'd think he'd be the last one to have his smoke alarm going off all the time. This morning was mild. The other day, it was 45 minutes starting at 5:30 am. What a flake. What a dweeb. Fukcing no-mind! 

I don't know if I believe in God. I think it's all just random forces. 

Imagine if someone walked into a Church and told whoever was there,  "I don't think that there is a God. I think that it's all just random forces. It's all just Murphy's Law. Anything that can go wrong will go wrong including the Earth being created. The Earth having been created is a result of something gone wrong, an aberration, rather than a serendipity gone right kind of like how nacre creates the pearl of an oyster resulting from a kind of sickness in the oyster. This explains why society and the streets in general is just saturated with delinquency. And the Earth does look like a pearl from a distance in space too. That says it all. Often, life gives you clues." 

What would I think would happen? The attendant calls the Priest of that Church who then calls all Priests of all other Churches, "I think we should shut all it down just because someone walked in off the streets and said that it's all just random forces." 

Right. And this is after hundreds of years of tradition and history. Uh, I don't think so.