Ape Covid Ril 2021

 

Greta Thunberg got an honorary degree from UBC? What. For parroting ideas from her ANTIFA handlers while disregarding the Milankovitch cycle? UBC is a second rate backwater University. UBC is certainly not on the level of Harvard, Yale, UCLA, or Oxford, Cambridge or Eton. 

Dr Bonnie Henry got an honorary degree from UBC too.

UBC is a nice place to visit. But to actually study any courses there and to pay money for it?! First of all, I have ADD or attention deficit disorder. The mind wanders. During a one hour study hall it would be impossible to get and remember every word. Homework was awful enough in high school and that was free. If I had the money to go to University, I would rather go travelling overseas a thousand times over and once overseas, never come back.  People who are poor and get short shrift from the towns they come from, not likely to inherit any money or be able to afford to go to University  but who are otherwise also very intelligent and can naturally learn to speak other languages well unlike some of the richer people they know go overseas and rather than regressing to some erstwhile inferior bullshit scene, stay overseas and do really well and have the added advantage of the experience of traveling. And for some reason that's a threat to some of those people in the towns they came from. Most people who live overseas are in the catbirds seat. There's no real legal reason for them to repatriate. Why should they? Their old country is run to the ground. Their old country is a backwater while the new country overseas is a rock show!

My advice for any expat is: Don't come back. If I were where you are, I wouldn't come back. Coming back is a square backwater regression to some former bullshit. Not coming back is cool and is the spirit of adventure. I admire expats like Karl Rock and Benjamin Rich who managed to slip through the mass governmental  trawler and seiner's net of tow the local backwater line Covid-based forced repatriation. Good on them! They didn't fall for the government's scheme to make them regress back to some former bullshit backwater Western sterilized shithole inferior scene. 

New advice: Adventure is one thing. However it really doesn't matter where you are. Some of the happiest people are people who live in their own towns. Space, how far away you are is one thing. Time is another. A person living in a town 100 miles away for ten years is the same as someone living in a town 1,000 miles away for one year. Also a person in their twenties living overseas or a person in their forties living in their own town. However things were in their twenties, if they stay and don't move things will get better in their own town in their 30s and yet even better in their forties. Every ten years is a new season in the television series of life, heck even one year is a new season let alone ten years. Every ten years changes the dynamic. Women whom were getting to know you and were unsure about me, after ten year they get more sure about me and after some time there is an increase for fun times like me scoring with three women! 

The government doesn't care if people decide to move to another country. It's your right. Every year millions of people move to another country. How can humans go from Kardashev 1 to Kardashev 2 if people aren't able to freely travel? 

The pandemic will be over later this year and people can travel again and small restaurants can open up again. PM Justin Trudeau said most Canadians will be vaccinated before July 1st or Canada. President Joe Biden said most Americans will be vaccinated before the 4th of July. 

However, life is like a 19th century novel full of twists and turns and who knows if we will all really be vaccinated before July but as things are going, that should be the case.

Clarice, April 1st episode, rewritten: 

Senator Martin: You always stay at the worst point in your life. You're in love with it. It influences your relationships. The place smells of it. People see this about you and wish it never happened to you. You're lucky that your father isn't alive to see you like this.

Catherine Martin: Are you talking about my issues with Buffalo Bill or are you talking referring to yourself in the second person, again, about your political career? I'm confused here.

I want to talk about how when I come cartoon project, the project itself which is a saved file consisting of a lot of drawings, pictures, a lot which made it into the final cut of the cartoon and a lot of animation cells which simply didn't. I've included a lot of these kinds of drawings ever since I emigrated to FlipAClip. Windows Movie Maker had the video editing apparatus which the completed drawings were set on and a separate file which all pictures and drawings including animation cells were stored. 

On FlipAClip which is on a tablet, these projects take up space. It's nearly impossible to save these project files elsewhere because they are encoded. 

And after completing the cartoon, I just about never ever look back on the projects. I don't ever go back into the completed project files for any reason.

The point is, I'm letting you know that after awhile, I will be deleting the old project files completely to save space. 

I thought of going into the project files and looking at, or even selling some of the individual pictures but anyone can freeze frame my cartoons at any point and make a picture or a poster out of it, so that idea is redundant. No one wants a freeze frame of animation cells. No one generally wants a freeze frame from an animation cell from a professional cartoon let alone an amateur one. So throw it out, save space. I am a bit of a collector, I like to collect things like Star Wars cards and Raiders of the Lost Ark cards. One day, I'd like to get a few used original 1976 Saturday Night Fever cards if I could ever find that. Maybe on eBay. Even seeing images of SNF trading cards on Google images is a blast!

Deleting entire completed project files to save space seems like a sin, but there's no other way to free up space for future projects unless I purchase new tablets. However, using this method, eventually I'd have over a hundred tablets. Too much!

iJustine demonstrated a new spatial reality tablet with Sony proprietary technology which makes the screen image seem 3D much more intensely than with a Nintendo 3DS. The effect is so profound that even an experienced techno expert like iJustine was amazed. I wouldn't mind getting one of these tablets.

But like with 8K, there isn't much technology that is fully compatible with this and made specifically  with this technology in mind. There are a few music videos that do this like Tate McRae's You Broke Me First.

 

I have to stop watching the News. I'll only watch the News sometimes. The racially charged stories, all the race-baiting, and the Covid stories. News is outrage media. News is just another show. News is stories you'll only hear about on the News and nowhere else. 

News reporters and anchors are known for being alcoholics and it must be all the dehumanizing News stories they have to read off the teleprompter every day which can lead to depression. 

A person has more of a chance of winning $100, if not $100 certainly $10 on a scratch ticket than being the victim of a racial attack. I don't play Lotto 649 often but even I won $10 on Lotto 649 twice. 

Tetris, the new version on Android is really really good or I wouldn't be writing about it. After playing Tetris for decades, this version of Tetris is a worthy successor. 

My cartoons are leisurely doodles. I remember when I was an English teacher in Thailand. One day on a lunch break I doodled a picture of a Chinese dragon climbing the clouds. My drawings are mediocre skill. There's much better art on DeviantArt. I got command of line but DeviantArt artists know how to give it that oil painterly photorealistic look. If I added more texture, if I added light reflecting and dark shadow areas on clothing paying attention to the natural folds and contours of fabric. That takes observation. 

The government is very kind to me and I am paid well as I go through life. For that, I give back through cartoons. The world is full of talented people and every day, I am surrounded with people who are talented in all kinds of different areas.

I strive to make my cartoons better and better. Even if I don't become a millionaire through my cartoons so I can live out my ultimate dream and that would be to live at a five star hotel in Sukhumvit, Bangkok, like the Rembrandt Hotel or the Imperial Hotel at Queen's Park in Sukhumvit. 

But for me such a dream could last no longer than 20-30 years. At 50, I can only expect to live so long. A body is like a battery. Telemeres. One day, at an average and to be expected timeframe, the energy runs out. 

I never got married but could it be because I gravitate to the lifestyle of spending 23 hours a day in my room? No marriage is better than a trainwreck of a marriage, the ones that wind up on the 6 o clock News.

However, even though I usually though not always spend 23 hours a day in my room, over the years I still have been able to meet a lot of women. That's baffling. How is that so?  

I don't see any hope in my life. Princess Leia said, "Hope is like the sun. If we believe in it only when we see it, we'll never make it through the night."

Things can change very quickly. It's a long road that has no turning. The hope is in that knowing that things can and often do change for the better. 

I paid $1.38 for Monopoly Sudoku. Why?! I am absolutely terrible at Sudoku! My skill level at Sudoku I would rate at zero out of ten. 

I got another strange comment on my Bruce Lee Game of Death video. "Thank you for wasting my time."

I was going to fire off a reply like, "If you don't like it then don't watch it. What kind of drawing skills and animation skills do you have?! You really didn't have to leave a comment. Don't put yourself out on my account. Don't do me any favors."

But a multi sentence reply to a single sentence comment is socially lopsided.

The phenomenon of socmed has been around for nearly 20 years starting with emails. Then it was blogs, then it was YouTube videos. 

I don't know what to think about the comment. I often see movies on IMDb or apps on Google Play with the most terrible reviews verging on verbal abuse. It's common. Most people who write whatever comments on movies or apps don't or can't make movies or apps themselves. Everyone's a critic. 

The major stars on YouTube get all kinds of comments every day. Sometimes you got to do a bit of digging but the strange comments are there. The stars don't waste a second thinking about who could it be and was it because I did this or that? Causation or correlation?

Getting mean comments is level one. People actually making videos criticizing you with all mean comments is level two. Heads of State and other high level celebrities had this happen to them. Level three is when they make websites about you replete with lots of the aforementioned types of YouTube videos.

Subjectively, someone wrote a strange comment on my YouTube video.

Objectively, someone wrote a comment on a YouTube video.

As for Bruce Lee and Tracy Thorn, I guess that really isn't me. Three days ago on Tuesday, April 6, at the Dollarama, a shoplifter was trying to run out of the store with a box of Hershey's white chocolates he was trying to boost. This was happening near the cash registers as an East Indian employee was trying to stop him. There was a lot of pushing and shoving. I was there with my girlfriend who is in a wheelchair with me being her PCAD or personal care attendant for the disabled. I just stood there and didn't do anything. As the shoplifter was running out, someone from my building, a tall gentle guy with a mustache, long blond hair, he actually attempted to tackle the guy, putting his arms around him. But the shoplifter extricated himself, more pushes and shoves and the shoplifter ran out into the streets without the box of Hershey's white chocolates.

I was a coward. I stood there and didn't do anything. I was caught off guard, not angry, and didn't see a crisis situation. If someone's life was being threatened I would have looked for a weapon of opportunity. A navy seal said on YouTube, "Control the spine. One person gets the legs, another gets the head. Get others to help you." 

I didn't do any of that. I thought the shoplifter might have a knife and I'd get a life changing injury. If I not involved to the level where I was fighting him, there's a good chance I might have to testify in court. Forget that! 

But I did stand my ground and at some point, I was 🕺 dancing, I couldn't help it. I didn't retreat which would have been more cowardly as I was standing 7 feet away from the shoplifter!

If I had Police Academy training, I would have known how to handle that. However, how many normal average citizens actually have Police Academy training?

Bruce Lee used to practice doing 1,000 punches and 1,000 kicks every day. Most people don't do that!

Comments used to mean more years ago when there was, all put together, five or ten years worth of videos on YouTube. Conceivably then, a person could watch all the videos on YouTube in five years but that's with 24 hours a day of watching and no videos watched twice. And then, if a person generated a 500 comments angry comment thread on YouTube, that would've been about 1% of all the comments on YouTube.

Today, there's about a thousand years worth of videos, all put together, on YouTube. A 500 comments thread would be .00001% of all comments on YouTube. In the face of that, what's another mean comment? The law of diminishing returns....

-------------------------------------------------

"Late last night I heard the screen door slam

And a big yellow taxi took away my old man." 

Joni Mitchell

Holy smokes! I just found out that His Royal Majesty Prince Philip died! RIP is an understatement. It hasn't hit me yet. I found out through a YouTube notification that just popped up on my tablet. 

Thank You Sir, indeed for the many decades of dedicated service to Crown and Country. 

I'll never get my Duke of Edinburgh Award now....

------------------------------------

Ad Astra is the most under rated movie of the decade. One reviewer even wrote, "Two hours slow boring. Don't waste your time." I thought it was a ten stars diamond platinum movie. One of the best I've ever seen. I bought a copy of it on Blu Ray and thanks to the digital code I entered, I can see it on YouTube on 4K UHD disc upscaling as that is becoming standard on YouTube videos. I've seen so many videos on YouTube that I swear was in real 4K UHD upscaling. 

Ad Astra talks about commercial space tourism to the moon. There are two diametrically opposing conspiracy theories about the moon. 1. There is a secret space program. You need security clearance level 8. There are 100,000 people now living on moon colonies on the dark side of the moon. 2. Aliens warned people against visiting the moon ever again as the moon is infested with Aliens warding people away. 

I don't know what's really going on in terms of future commercial space tourism to the moon. 5 countries can do this: United States, Russia, China, India, and France have the strongest space programs in the World.

In my current cartoon, the main character, me will be an exotic dancer for his female clients. However I will depict it as very censored. So censored it could be rated G. It would only be graphically implied that he is an exotic dancer and not depicted so much as such. 

Also this cartoon will be my first and perhaps only cartoon that will depict Punjabi. The vision: There is a scene of Mars. Multiple spaceships flying in a beautiful scale immersed in the scarlet crimson red that Mars is known for. Two East Indians are flying in a separate ship, a turbaned man and a woman next to him. The man says, talking of the beautiful Martian landscape, "Ee a bot Sundar hay." It's beautiful. It's an idea. The cartoon won't be much longer. Less than 17 scenes left. I'm not planning to make a long movie like Ben Hur or something like that.

In the movie Ad Astra, Brad Pitt went on to Jupiter, Saturn and beyond. My cartoon stops at Mars. It won't be going beyond.

In a deleted scene of Ad Astra, someone said that space travel can make a person's mind snap when they realize how far away they are from the Earth. I could believe that. How many Earth lengths away? What if something went wrong? How long would it take to go back? That can snap a person's mind. I wouldn't want to travel in space.  

I was a PCAD of sort for a few months however I want to quit. This person I am a PCAD for is a lazy clumsy retard. All the time, walking around, coasting along normally, and then yet another crazy clumsy retarded surprise. Time and time again! Yesterday, she dropped not one but two energy drinks at the store. She is so lazy she doesn't do things that others do for themselves. I take out the garbage for her. I've been doing it daily for her for years. She is incredibly lazy. Never once have I seen her do it for herself. Never once have I visited and saw that she already took out her garbage herself. Give an inch and they'll take a mile. 

She's the only person in the building where you do something once for her and you'll be doing it for her all the time. Others would be like, "You don't have to do it, I'll do it." And then I actually see them having done it! But not with this one.

The only reward I get for working for her is more work. Work for her for one month. What reward do I get for that? I have to work for her for two months. Work for her for six months. What reward do I get for that? I have to work for her for seven months. That's if I let it get to that point. She has seven nurses visiting her. Even the landlord said, "You don't have to work for her. She has nurses visiting her. They want to do the work but they keep being sent away because you did the work." I'm not legally required to work for her. 

Someone like her is an energy drain. What am I helping? She's got nothing going for her. No hobbies, she doesn't read novels or magazines, she doesn't play video games. All she does is sit on her bed and smoke two cartons of cigarettes a week! She is a bottomless hole. 

I have to reclaim my life. I'm going to stop working for her at the end of this month.

She talks about cheque days. The dynamic is totally opposite. She sees another month of leisure. I see another month of work. I make her life a downhill walk. She makes my life an uphill climb. She's a prime example of if the forces of life can be an asshole, it will be an asshole.  I give her a certain kind of energy, helpfulness, thoughtfulness. She returns it with helplessness and thoughtlessness. That's what I get back. That's the energy I get back. Behind her is the goddamned forces of life. 

It'd be one thing if she didnt have seven nurses visiting her. I'm not really qualified to help her, work for her and I don't want to. 

What work? Make her bed. Take out her garbage. Give her a bath every two days. Wheel her to a few stores in her wheelchair. Help her out on her leg brace every night between 8:30 and 9:30. Every day, for months on end. The making the bed and taking out the garbages and dishes she should do for herself like everybody else does but she is profoundly stubbornly lazy.

I'm always bailing her out! Bailing her out! Bailing her out! Bailing her out doesn't give me a sense of accomplishment. It makes me feel like I've been taken advantage of, I feel like I'm draining my energy into some bottomless hole.

I'm giving up on her. She's a bottomless hole of laziness. I have to give up on the friendship. For all that work, she doesn't pay me much. For months on end, she would forget to step up to the plate and pay me on chequeday. I had to remind her for a few months in a row. Thoughtless. Lazy. Retarded. She doesn't pay me much. Some nominal sum. I used to do it for her out of kindness but how much more kindness is required. How many more months. Some people are an energy drain and to save myself, I have to stop knowing her. I'm not legally required to work for her or help her. She's already got seven nurses visiting her! The state is already sending seven nurses to look after her.

She'll be crippled for at least another few months. At least. I used to look ahead to next month and see a free field of leisure. Now I look ahead to next month and all I see is another month of work. She talks about next cheque day. Next cheque day is another day of leisure for her. Next cheque day is another day of work for me! She turns every month of mine into a mountain of work and chores. Not anymore. I've done it long enough. She has to make her own way in life. I can't go on coddling a 'tard. 

Why did the forces of life have to align me with this energy? Goddamned the fucking forces of life. 

I hate the incidental details of my life. Shit details, shit incidentals. I wouldn't mind giving up on life. I wish I could just walk out of life like walking out of a job. Just walk off the job. I would like to overdose on Dilaudid or China White. Or else at least I'd like to move to another town. 

If I help this person I will have gone from capital letter 'D' Dean to small letter 'd' dean. She will make me into a shell of what I once was. People like her are retarded moochers and leeches and will take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take and take because she's a taker! 

I really really hope I see the last of her one day. Like a lady once told me, "You leave them where you find them."

I hope that she just disappears from my life one day.

Don't be a burden to others. Don't let others be a burden to you. Don't take advantage of another person's kindness. Don't let others take advantage of your kindness.

"Neither a borrower nor a lender be." Shakespeare

"Avoid the mentally retarded." "Never stay with a dud." William Burroughs

I've worked with better. I used to have intellectual friends like Norm Mitchell, Terry Edwards, Mark Roy, Richard Leavis and Harold Wallace. Now I'm always hanging around this retarded thing?! She says that Djendaritus is the name of a town. How retarded is that? It's the shits. It's the cans. It's cat's ass! That's what the goddamned fucking forces of life has set me up with. 

With any name, there are quite a few people with that name.

God damn the forces of life. If the forces of life can be an asshole, it will be an asshole. The forces of life is a defective incompetent algorithm. Life is only barely worth living and the value of life is finite. Life is only worth so much to me and no more. Life is actually mostly bullshit and that's speaking from experience. To live a life full of bullshit people, to live a life full of bullshit energy is counterefficient and is existentialist counterproductive. I've given a great deal of thought to just giving up on life. 

Most people on the planet I imagine would say, "I don't blame you. If I met as many bullshit people as you've met, I'd want to give up on life too."

There is a love-hate dynamic. I am simultaneously fully willing to do the work while being this close to quitting. Willing isn't the same as wanting or else I wouldn't be this close to quitting. It says more that I write something negative but still do the work than tomwrite the most orifice glowing thing but secretly actually not do the work. I'm still doing the work. I don't know how much longer I'll have to be a PCAD. She could be crippled for month if not years to come. How good is medical science? Are they giving her the runaround? But she has seven nurses visit her which leaves me wondering what it would look like if she were not getting the runaround. If she's crippled for long enough she might have to be moved into assisted living. 

She is a very beautiful lady and has the face of an angel.

Names are like, some people who work on the News, their names remind me of names of people I used to know. Generally as the asshole forces of life Murphy's Law would have it, they are the names of people unpleasant rather than people pleasant.

This makes me think the News is making secret cryptic references about me all the time. 

If they were thinking of me as much as I claim, they would have contacted me if they were thinking of me in the positive. Or else they would have had me killed years ago if they thought of me in the negative. How do they know I'm watching? What if I had somehow all of a sudden died, then they would have been wasting their time. I think they're talking about me, well you know the old saying, "If they're talking about you it means that they're leaving somebody else alone." Why don't I extend that to why do I think that they're talking about me while at the same time not talking about others like former heads of State of this country, all kinds and levels of politicians, star athletes. Who am I? The News is an industry that talks about the most most major high level controversial intense people. The News cherry picks through a pile of possible stories and unless it has a minimal amount of intensity of interest value they're simply not interested in doing that story. The News routinely talks about people who do the most intense and outrageous things and then all of a sudden I would think they'd be interested in me? For what reason? 

There are a lot of people who think this and this would be my advice for them. The News is not secretly talking about you!

The News is really talking about themselves. The News is pernicious troublemakers and as such, they are trouble to others and trouble to themselves. Trouble to themselves as people are writing letters to them and calling them to task on their bullshit. That the government sometimes calls them and complains or has an issue about how they covered the story. Trouble to themselves as people stop watching the News and watch their DVD machines instead so as a result their ratings tank. The News is culture.

"Culture is not your friend." Terence McKenna

I discovered SNES. It's an upgrade from the N64. I got an emulator and SNES is better than GBA for Donkey Kong Country which I downloaded for my SNES emulator. The graphics are sharper. SNES is the one just before Playstation 1 and SNES is the more expensive than GBA for home television. Not bad. I get to try it for free. I like DKC on SNES better than GBA. Mario Kart looks awful on SNES.

Transiberia is a good movie. Woody Harrelson is in the movie. The movie is good. Most movies baffle me and I turn it off as even 45 minutes into it, I'm not getting the thread of the plot. This movie kept me watching to the end and even being on my tablet at times throughout the movie, the well structured plotline is evident. Ben Kingsley stars in the movie as well portraying a member of the Moscow City Police. The plot is the Woody Harrelson character and his wife is an American couple who go on a trip to Russia after their Church sponsors them for a free trip to go. They meet another couple, a Mexican man and a Russian woman. The Mexican man is also some kind of drug dealer and is the person the Ben Kingsley character is looking for. Good movie. Lots of plot twists and turns. 

-----------------------

Planet Ant is a great app. It's a world builder somewhat similar to Walking Dead Survivors in set up. However the graphics are in 8K. It looks lush, superb and has the good sweet vibes of visiting an ultra modern science museum during an annual vacation to another town. There is a learning curve that and the questionability of whether the game actually scientifically accurately resembles in an ant farm or whether it's all just made up for the sake of making an app. I uninstalled it because of the learning curve and because of wondering whether it's scientifically real or whether it's just bullshit.

I uninstalled Planet Ant because of the requirement to join an alliance. I usually don't do well in those types of games.

Planet Ant I reinstalled. This is a desert island app. It is nothing short of spectacularly breathtaking. The ants are in glorious lucid 8K and they are moving. The common and Latin taxonomical name is there plus a few facts about the different species of ants. 

The only problem I have is alliances and clans. I somehow joined an alliance. Rallying is a problem. I usually an unable to form nor join a rally. In Planet Ant, today, I was invited to join a battle or probably rally. Cost: 2,000 gems, that's if I opted to join.  Just for one solitary battle. Expensive. What if the battle is lost? In spite of whatever alliance configured embroglios, I'm still playing Planet Ant because of the most beautiful profile animations and pictures of the different ant species.

Ants make up 20% of the weight of all animals on Earth.

Ants form supercolonies and all they ever do is raid other ant nests and kill off and pillage everything they can. This sounds like most of the human species in any country during the first half of the last millenium. There was a lot of that then. Maybe it still happens now. If not through economic and financial means then through a global pandemic. Large swaths of populations decimated. Goods pillaged. Welcome to planet Earth.  

From Kursesagt on YouTube: Amazon ants supercolonies are currently in an ongoing war with red fire ant supercolonies in the United States and Europe. Two kingdoms at war, like an insectoid Game of Thrones. Only a few ant species are capable of producing supercolonies and these two are amongst them. The supercolonies wiped out 90% of the ant species that were previously there. The rabbit hole gets deeper. The Amazon ants were exported to other countries, United States, Europe, accidentally in the holds of ships in the 1890s. The red fire ants were also exported in this way in the 1930s. The red fire ants made up for forty years of head start that the Amazon ants had by being twice as large and twice as aggressive and also having a larger stinger that injected venom that the Amazon ants didn't have helped.  

The government is so awesome that they have government agencies keeping track of these things. Michio Kaku said aliens probably wouldn't visit us because it would be like a human to visit a termite nest. Wrong. Humans do visit termite or ant nests in this case and study them intensively.

So aliens could be intensely studying us. We share 60 of our DNA with insects. Ants have large compound eyes just like grey aliens. Aliens probably have some insect DNA as well. Insects and humans come from the same planets aliens did and Earth is a kind of lower species petri dish for them.

My town has an insectararium which is basically an insect zoo. It has the most interesting choice of ants for its displays. One of the species is a common colony builder, and it is either the crematogaster cerasi, the formica fusca, or the camponotus sp. The species that the town insect terrarium has is the atta cephalote or leaf cutter ant. The other species is the one where Justin Schmidt concocted an intricate pain scale and gave it a rating of 4.5 on the pain scale likening it to walking on hot coals with hot nails imbedded three inches into your heel. It's called the bullet ant for obvious reasons. Probably not the best ant to have in an insectararium if one ever escapes but not the worst one either  because it is very interesting.

On the blog of the insectararium, there are some mindblowing facts. The princess ant before she becomes a queen ant has a sac in her body called the spermathacea. This pouch holds and keeps sperm viable for up to 15 years! This is the superfetation of rabbits how a female rabbit can conceive another set of rabbits while already having another set of rabbit already half assed developed in her body on steroids! 

Most ant eggs that are discharged are males, they are haploid and do not need sperm to develop. Females are dihaploid as they had the addition sperm to develop. Therefore all male ants are technically bastards having no father. While female ants or Queens have two parents.

The leaf cutter ant grows a mold on its body to keep a predator fungus from eating another type of fungus which it needs to cultivate for its survival. The mold on its body, the predator fungus and the fungus it needs to cultivate is found nowhere else on earth other than in leafcutter ant nests. Those creatures somehow created their own species of fungi! Mind blowing. Learned from AntsCanada, video called My Dream Ant Farm filmed at an insectararium in Montreal.

A female praying mantis can take down a hummingbird and there are YouTube videos about this. But a praying mantis is no match against an ant colony.

My only issue which is a non issue with this app is the fighting units in which you group different ant species together to fight in battles. In real life some of these species would never fight together and would only ever fight each other to the level of supercooling vs supercooling for eg Amazon army ants and red fire ants. This isn't helpful in really teaching all that much about ants. But a lot of games do this for eg The Walking Dead No Man's Land where you can have Alpha fight on the same team along with Tara and Henry where in the show she killed them.

In this game you have crematogaster cerasi and the formica fusca fighting alongside with paraparatrechina bufona and the prenolepis melanogaster alongside with pheidole Rhea and pheidole bergi, living altogether in one common nest even to the point of hatching alongside one another. What is this, Apocalypto?

In Apocalypto, you had the Olmecs mingling with Aztecs and Mayans and a few Quechas in a  city square like they were all part of the same club when in reality some of these tribes lived thousands of miles away from one another or were rivals.

Video games are known for irrelevant things not even trying to attempt to be true to the premise of the game they're developing like Back to the Future video game where Marty is dodging bowling balls. Just like he didn't do in the movie.

AntsCanada is a very good YouTube channel which talks about ants. Although, all of his ant terrariums are in the Philippines. Why not AntsPhilippines? I'm guessing the channel comprising of a group of myrmecologist entemologist researchers from Canada and the rule of ant keeping is that it's better to keep ants of a local variety which is regarded as more ethical than owning species from far far away. That doesn't stop insect terrariums from having cockroaches from SE Asia. Ants are different.

The aliens in the movie Aliens are a lot like ants. So are Grey Aliens. There's a Queen and a King on their home planet but they rarely arrive to visit Earth in spaceships, it's usually the gender neutral workers.

I once stayed in a room in Thailand where there was a lot of flying ants which have since reminded me of the Geonosians in Star Wars. Flying ants are alates which are winged males and queens during their mating period. To think, I was in such presence of royalty.

  

These are two ant farms I want to get. The first is from Etsy for $133. The second is from Tarheel Ants company for $89.

If I were to get an ant farm, I'd opt for the dinosaur ant of Australia which is a very very old and ancient species. Not only is the anatomy ancient. It's social patterns which it has retained are also ancient. The dinosaur ant looks a lot like the slender ant which is also an elegant species.

The dinosaur ant is monomorphic. All adult ants are the equal size.

The dinosaur ant has an ancient social structure in that they a species of ant that can live without a queen ant. In this type of ant society a worker ant spontaneously sexes themself to become a queen ant. This isn't as strange to them as it is to us as apparently the gamergate is a very popular role and lots of worker ants will fight each other until the final one is designated for the role.

I would like getting a dinosaur ant to someone from a high tech future in the year 100,000 getting a mint condition 2021 McLaren.

The top part of exposed open air ant farms is painted with fluon. This makes ants slip off glass being unable to get a grip hold. Fluon is made with one part baby powder, one part rubbing alcohol.

Online window shopping on AntsCanada dot com, there was a crematogaster cerasi or cherry acrobat ant from Canada. This ant will wave their abdomens and do a little dance when alarmed. Alas, all sold out. 

Most of the ant species are sold out but a lot are not. 

Formica Montana is a very aggressive polymorphous ant species. Their adults come in many sizes as the soldier ant is three times the size of a worker and the queen is about six times as large as a soldier! I saw a queen ant personally at the local insectarium on Monday April 26, 2021 and was she ever large. I was shocked for a second at how large.

Prenolepis imparis in all its golden honeypotted glory.

Prenolepis imparis has the most lovely repletes  meaning that a class of workers have a large golden honey jar attached as their abdomen. Beautiful golden lightless lanterns.

Prenolepis imparis is aka the winter ant and while most ants would not survive at a temperature of one degree Celsius, the winter ant needs and thrives on such a temperature 24 hours a day. Prenolepis imparis is available online and is not sold out because although one of the most beautiful, it is one of the most difficult to raise because you need an air conditioner.

Now I'm mulling over whether to get the dinosaur ant species or a species with repletes.

 

Dinosaur ant. Look at the face!

Slender ant.

There is virtual fireplace and virtual fish tank where a person can watch a long play, maybe a repeating loop, maybe not, for hours and hours. The 3 hour DVD of fireplace or fishtank is well known. I would like to see a YouTube video of a virtual ant farm. Maybe one day they would have a lot of videos with lots of different species. 

I don't know if I get an ant farm that I won't be tired of it. What risk is there of ants escaping? Even one ant can found a new colony. 

The landlord said I could get an ant farm but any ant escapes would result in eviction.

Like Henry David Thoreau said, "These things are a lot more easily gotten than gotten rid of." He didn't say that about ant farms, though.

------------------------------------

I saw an ad for an app I haven't seen since. I've been searching and been unable to find it. It's a game about guess what I'm thinking and write it down. In one example, a gorilla sees humans at the zoo and thinks either "why are you so bald?" Or "try tapping the glass one more time." Anyways I didn't get the name of the app. Those are the only clues.

I saw the ad on an NES emulator where you got to watch an ad to download a game. I downloaded about a hundred games since watching lots of ads. None of them were the ad I wanted. Usually these ads repeat. Goddamned forces of life. Look for something and don't find it. I give up. Maybe I'll see the ad again. Maybe I won't. Look for shit and not find it. Waste of time. Waste of energy. Waste of life. 

My next door neighbor has a swollen lump on his left elbow. He's had it for a few days. The lump isn't quite the size of a golf ball. Think larger, more like a tennis ball! It looks bad. He didn't go to the doctor yet. But he's the guy who would have an abscessed tooth for two months only then to see a dentist. That's not good. One should never procrastinate for medical emergencies. It might be bursitis but I'm not a doctor. It might be tetanus but through what vector? Usually tetanus is gotten after stepping on a rusty nail. Or it can be gotten from an animal bite. But he didn't have either of that.  I suggested he go talk to a pharmacist. They are often the doctors for people who can't afford to or don't want to see a doctor.

I know someone with a knee problem. Between the elbow problem and the knee problem, they'd be a matched set. 

Interestingly, the stripper bar in Dawson Creek is, was, called Elbows. I don't know if it's still called that now. It's been a few years since I was there. I don't plan on going there ever again. 

It's not the bubonic plague but it is a bubonic plague. Buboes means bulb. His elbow problem could be an abscess and if it can't explode outward, it will implode inward. My girlfriend thinks it's an abscess.

He still hasn't even seen a pharmacist! Bubonic plague would be bulbs in the lymph nodes mainly the elbow and the groin. But if he had bubonic plague to that level where there are visible tennis ball sized bulbs at his lymph node sites, no way would be be walking and talking as quickly as he is.

With the case numbers being what they are, I might die of Covid 19. I resigned myself to that possibility. My life is going nowhere. Scientifically and objectively speaking there is no hope of no future for certain very specific things when you're living in the wrong country let alone the wrong town. The only thing is that I'd want to get it over with as quickly as possible. The day of death would be a weird day but it would soon enough have been gotten over with.

The forces of my life are errant, miscreant, defective and fucked. Once my life is over and I'm in the afterlife, I may or may not still have to worry about that but it would be under a new dynamic along a different set of physics. 

My life problems play back to me in my mind again and again like a broken record. Upon death, I drop the problems and walk away from them, feeling the distance away from them, that those problem are now in a sense, literally someone else's problem now. That would be a good day. My tawdry problems. 

Life is good. Not all the time did the forces of life jerk me around. I met lots of good people. Google doesn't give me back money because I never gave them money in the first place. Me giving art and writings to Google eventually karmically led me to a place where I get a lot of art in the form of free apps and free literature because there are a lot of books me good ones too for free on Google books. Getting a tablet is like traveling to a third world country. The airfare is expensive but you can get deals, but once you get there, everything is really cheap. The tablet is expensive but you can get deals especially at a pawn store and even better deals in the sell and trade newspapers. Once you get the tablet, most apps are free or at little cost.

Although, there is an app called The Most Expensive Nothing costing $489.99 from developer P3TRK and has absolutely nothing. Getting this app teaches you profound lessons that totally resonate with life itself. Often you give others something and then these others give absolutely nothing back in return. No money, no nothing. 

There is another app called the most expensive clicker costing $499.99 from developer Sit Think Earn Studio but at least with that one, you do get a goddamned clicker at least. Only someone deep in the throes of coming down off of some awful drug and all the attendant evils of lack of restraint and inhibition that such an egregious and pernicious mental state could bring and someone who is a trust fund baby with a $10,000 prepaid Google Play account would get that and most likely not even then. There are no reviews and ratings on such games and if there were, it would be a shill writing on behalf of the developer if not the developer himself. But at such an insane pricing tier, pro-rated, not even someone as rich as Bill Gates could afford such an app at the price of $500 for absolutely nothing or next to nothing. You do get a graphic. The word nothing written in an all lower case letters sans calibri font and in a regular and not in a bold font setting. The developer wouldn't even splurge in opting for a bold font setting which demonstrates the utmost in parsimoniousness.

The most expensive nothing app isn't nothing. It's a front for a money laundering scam. Or at least the potential is there!

I myself splurged and got some legalized THC gummies. I haven't tried them. I wonder how intense they are. This might help with developing artistic inspiration but to what end? The cartoons are getting me where? I don't know. I have a small but loyal following. I've gotten quite a few views over the years and a reputation as an animated cartoonist. Maybe one day I'll work for Disney animating visual storyboards for certain scenes or segments in a larger episode where theres other segments I'd have nothing to do with. 

I imagine that Disney now has the world monopoly on animation. There used to be a bunch of competing animation companies but now they're all under the Disney umbrella. Is that true or not? What about other countries?

------------------------------

"A delayed game can wind up being good but a rushed game is never good." Shigeru Miyamoto, creator of Donkey Kong*

*Cyberpunk 2077; YouTube

The Witcher is an intensely popular video game series based on a mythological story from Poland. Witcher 3 was very popular and riding on that popularity the same developers released Cyberpunk 2077 which bombed. The game was rushed. Hopefully Witcher 4 will be released. I want to learn the story of Witcher. I presume that there's as much of a weeks long or else months long learning curve as with GOT and LOTR. Medieval settinged stories like that.

Maybe one day Android can do a Witcher type app. There's already a Witcher playing card game that plays very similar to Hearthstone, Magic the Gathering card Game and Mafioso card game.

I do like the card games and they usually have the most visceral and visually spectacular graphics.

-------------------------------

There are emulators that you can install. Install MyOldBoy, MyBoy, which are Nintendo GBC and GBA emulators. Install Heinrick's PSP or Nintendo DS emulator. 

Once you install one or all of the above, install 7 zip.

Then go to wowroms dot com and choose the game you want. Follow the easy self explanatory instructions. I remember with emuparadise and Romsmania, a GBA game would be 30 mb. They used a quantum computer and new compressed computer language to shrink an average GBA game to 2mB.  The picture above is a 5 mb computer chip of the 1950s being loaded onto an airplane during the 1950s. And you thought the cellphones that were the size of a brick in the mid 80s was bad. Even then, theoretically, that computer chip was good enough for 2 GBA iso extracted zips off wowroma dot com. So it wasn't that bad.

Once you extracted the zip file, delete the orange ROM folder to save space. There should be another corresponding  yellow iso folder automatically there. Then go open the emulator or an emulator, go to Downloads and you should see the game there. Click it. It should work.

All these games have been upscaled to 4K. Some GBA games even upscaled to 4K still looks wretched.

There also an app called '80s and 90s all games in one!' which is an NES emulator with just about every game the NES ever made built in! Most games are absolute garbage! 

Playing the old games is like taking a step backwards. It's yesterday's technology. Still, I got Donkey Kong Country 1, 2, and 3 on GBC, GBA, and SNES. It looks best on SNES.

Tragedy: I got my PSP wet. Result: Bricked forever.

Solution: Unless I want to actually play PSP games on that tiny screen, it's better to get an MP3 player. A PSP off of Amazon would be over $200 not including shipping. It's old technology playing games made in 2005 to 2012. An 4GB MP3 player costs as little as $30 but that's a basic model with almost no screen. RCA and a brand called Borne sells a good 4GB storage MP3 player for $60. Sony sells a really good MP3 player, 16 GB for $110.

I got to get a replacement Sony PSP. With that logic, I might as well get an 8 track player and a black and white glass television while I'm at it. I only ever used the PSP for the past 3 years as a Sony Walkman. I would like to get a Sony brand MP3 player because of the spiritual connection to the Sony Walk-man of the early 80s, not the knock off Candle brand Walky-Music also of the early 80s.

RIP: my old Sony PSP 3000 died a watery death.

Two days ago, I got some lotus flowers that uses water to light it! There are two electrodes at the bottom and water would act the ground connecting the two leads, positive and negative. Result, it lights up!

The innards of a PSP and indeed a whole host of other electronics work like that but in a bad way. Water will connect two usually unconnected circuits resulting in a short circuit, in most cases forever. Remove the battery, dry it out and it can run again. Turning it on with the battery in while it's wet and fucked up will automatically short circuit the inner electronics but how else would you find out that it doesn't work? 

These electronic fuck ups is life reminding not to be so sentimental and not to hold on to that black and white glass television bought in 1965 for $279 and that 8 track player gotten in 1973 for $179. Throw them away because newer technology is better and not too expensive.

I want to get a formica countertop and also a round green foundry glass globe container as they intensely remind me of the early 70s.

Several stores offer an actual Sony Walkman brand MP3 player for $50 with no micro SD card slot.

Mull over: 

1. Sony Walkman MP3. Price $60

Pros: Sony brand

Cons: Very small screen, MS DOS character display. No SD card slot.

2. RCA MP3. Price $60

Pros: Mid sized full color display screen. SD card slot option.

Cons: Sony, like Nike is a very strong brand. RCA stands for Radio Corporation of America although most if not all RCA electronics these days are made in China. Although Sony is at the apex. RCA is no slouch. I have an RCA 4K TV and have had that for years. Works good. 

I'll probably opt for the RCA. Bigger unit so it's not as easy to misplace it, much better features like full color screen. A miniature screen with MS DOS character display only  seems dead in comparison with a much larger full color display screen.

I got the $110 Sony NW-E394/B MP3 player with larger screen. It's basically a Sony Walkman. Works 100%, even 1000%. I got it at London Drugs although the website didn't say that model was available there. Better than the $60 Sony miniature mp3 stick or the RCA $60 with small screen. You get what you pay for. There are lots of more expensive lossless audio ones. Usually an mp3 plays only 15% to 25% of the information. Lossless audio decompresses and restores all that information for a much richer fuller sound. The even more expensive ones have an audio upscaling system. And the $2,000 Sony MP3 is gold plated and has a 4 braided wire system. The gold plating is best for conducting electricity.

Announcement: I threw my old water-bricked non-working PSP in the garbage. It's gone now. Gone. Gone. Far away. Far, far away.

I loved that PSP and would have had it for life otherwise. The demise of the PSP was precipated with a perfect storm chain of events. It was too hot so I didn't wear my jacket where the pocket is where I usually carry around my PSP. I put the PSP in a shopping bag. Walking around, I went to a restaurant and ordered some items and I carried it in the same bag where I had the PSP. The liquid of the items spilled out and got on my PSP. At first, it still worked but weirdly. Usually when I press the down button quickly, it would advance one song at a time. However when I did it at this point, it would always advance a few songs at a time. It never did that before. Then I ran it under the sink to get the water out. It didn't work. Turning it on with the battery in will automatically fry the circuit. Forever. If an electronic items gets wet. Do not turn it on and remove the battery immediately. Even then it may or not work. 

Don't put electronics in the same bag as carrying food. Those sauces are notorious for spilling out somewhat.

This is a good thing. The PSP 3000 that I had was released in October 2008.

The Sony NWE 394/B MP3 player was released on April 29, 2016.

This latest culinary event forced me to upgrade to newer technology. And a much better Walkman. The new MP3 Walkman sounds smooth. 

If I had the money, maybe I should get a more expensive lossless audio mp3 player which starts at $200 and above.

Don't get the $2,000 gold mp3 player or someone might try to swipe it. If one wants a gold mp3 player, they'd have to skillfully apply gold leaf paint to one already. If I applied gold leaf over the battery leads would it improve conductivity? I doubt it. Electronics is a very delicate thing. Any gold leafing would have to be already designed with that in mind. Otherwise it could short circuit.

The Room. Great escape game. Tommy Wiseau would be happy that an app with the namesake of his movie is so awesome. 

The Onkyo Hi Fi lossless audio app. 

I installed it and it is incredible. Life changing experience.  Amazing. Chills, in a good way. I listened to Bee Gees More Than A Woman. This app decompresses any MP3 stored on a tablet. It was like listening to a new version of it but exactly the same. When everything is replaced and improved, is it still the same as the original or is it a Theseus Boat? I digress. Bee Gees More Than A Woman. I heard instruments I never heard before. There is a ringing chiming bell quite distinct that I never heard before. This is mesmerizing and to think that I can have the lossless audio experience on my tablet. I got the Wicked Reverb headphones and to me, they are the champagne Mercedes brand. Lossless audio sounds very good on this. Of course if I had the money to get $2,500 headphones with planar magnetic disc drivers, it would be something else completely. 

I'm thinking of getting a Sony headphone with advertised 50mm conical driver. The Wicked Reverb has a 40mm driver. 

Wicked Evacs full sized, not half sized would be a really good headphone for at home. They are too delicate for on the move usage. But otherwise very very very good headphones.

Theseus boat. If a person gets multiple organ transplants as well as multiple neural prosthetic implants, is it still the same person?

Judgement Day. On that Lordly day after death the stalwart steward denizens representative of presumably the forces of life get to cast their aspersions on you. 

But also on that day you get a chance to give back and judge life itself and to give it a rating out of ten stars like rating a Google app or an Uber driver.

I would give life two stars out of ten. I got a bad set up. Life was a crooked table slanted against me. Bad systemic structure.  Raw deal. Apart from that, life was a rip off. Life didn't give me back what I put into it but instead life ripped me off what I put into it. I generated a certain kind of energy and life always insisted on returning it with a certain weird shit inferior energy. I generate the energy of talented cartoonist. So naturally the goddamned forces of life threw all these untalented non-cartoonists my way. 

I live a quiet life and like to meditate. And what do the goddamned shit forces of life give me in return?  The forces of life seem to say, "We love that for you."

That's what the goddamned forces of life give me in return. 

So in advance, I give life a 2 out of ten rating. Apart from that the awful ghastly wretched defective set of physics which includes pain, dying, tired and needing to sleep, non being able to teleport, not being able to be telepathic but who gives a fuck about that. A lot of people, you wouldn't wanna know what's in their Fred Flintstone gangsta minds. Also the shit physics in this dimension include having to have to go to the washroom, needing to shower, even eating is a tawdry experience if you eat to love rather than live to eat. Sometimes a tablet app is so exciting I skip meals. Pigs playing videos games are similar to rats at cocaine feeders, they will skip meals.

"Don't skip any meals." Hypnagogic voice

The afterlife has a better set of physics. There, one doesn't have to worry about eating, showering, going to the washroom, needing to sleep, a person can teleport and the exquisite superior physics of the afterlife will surround you in a realm only of people like you. A person talented as an artist are only with other people who are talented artists or else people just as talented in other crafts. But that applies to negativity as well. Whatever negative tendencies and to whatever degree you will be surrounded with too, people who are no more or less negative. Swedenborg says that. It sounds like a cult but its not a cult if I don't join the fucking thing. I take a cursory glance at some of the peripheral writings and a lot of it sounds like stuff that resonates with what I learned from keeping dream journals. Anyways, the forces of life in the afterlife and dream dimension don't rip a person off as much as the forces of life in this dimension. 

I rate life 2 stars out of ten. If life was a Google Play app, I would rate it one star out of ten every time and the above is the review I'd give it. Life, you're a shitty app. Uninstall. If only I had the option. 

The Room Tommy Wiseau chatbot app feeds responses after the user types in a message. I used it for awhile.

I felt like I was having a real conversation with Tommy Wiseau.

Chain of events, Friday, April 23, 2021. 

My old tower heater and fan was noisy. I went to Walmart and bought what I thought was a heater and fan tower for $39. Turns out it was fan only. Needing a heater, I went to London Drugs. Alas no heaters on sale but a Blu Ray was for sale for $1.99 The Blu Ray was called Marjorie Prime. Marjorie is a derivative of Margaret. It's a good story reminiscent of the 60 Minutes holocaust survivor who had some answers preserved before he died.

I haven't fully watched Marjorie Prime yet. Halfway through the movie, I was on the tablet. You don't watch a movie while playing the tablet at the same time and then think that you actually watched the movie or else who taught you how to watch movies? 

I suspect a twist ending that I missed. It's not a movie for the blind as you could not infer the plot through just listening to the movie like you can with other more masterful movies.

Marjorie Prime had a twist ending indeed! Spoilers: initially, you think that the Jon Hamm character Walter is the only hologram. Turns out Marjorie too and the Geena Davis character have all since died and are also holograms. The end scene where the three holograms are in a room at a time when the Tim Robbins character is old, how Marjorie sits in a rocking chair, her side facing a large curtained window. I saw my dead grandmother sitting in a room like that in a dream. The movie got it right!

Incidentally, Tim Robbins could represent QE2, Jon Hamm - Prince Philip, Marjorie the Queen Mother and Geena Davis as Princess Margaret. Bit of a stretch.

The best movies are movies that a blind person and a deaf person could walk away from the movie with as much of an understanding of the movie as non visually impaired or non deaf people have. Not many movies are that masterful. Star Wars is a movie that is that masterful. Also Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. A deaf person can use subtitles but there's no subtitles for the blind. Unless you have a braille speed reader some kind of tactile palpable app that uses a quantum computer to quickly produce then erase braille on a tiny handheld surface. But since governments are known for cutting funding for reading programs and updating libraries for the blind, this won't happen. A blind person doesn't need a library. No one reads books a library at a time. One reads books one book at a time. Even blind people. Purchasing one or two choice books a month is affordable even for the blind. 

Marjorie Prime rewritten:

"Walter thought I spent too much time on my feet. He said that I spend too much time making a living on my feet and that I should start earning a living on my back. That's when I said to him, "Did they teach you that at hologram school?"

MP rewritten: warning, reader discretion advised,

"I spend a lot of time thinking about Tony."

"With your finger in your cunt or out of your cunt?"

"Toni's a woman."

"Again, with your finger in your cunt or out of your cunt."

Most businesses like Walmart, etc have 85% locals and 15% tourists as clientele. Places like libraries and museums have 85% tourists and 15% locals as clientele. 

Libraries used to be the other way around. However libraries is becoming an obsolete industry like cobblers. Most people already have a library in the palm of their hand. Most people already have some form of cable tv, a Blu ray with YouTube and Tubi built in, so the free DVDs and Blu rays there on rental for free are redundant. Mostly tourists visit. 

"God is a verb." Frank vs God

I think God is just a set of probability and blind statistics.  God is not a noun nor a verb. He's just a set of blind probability and blind statistics. Which would explain a lot.

God is the algorithm that generates all other algorithms. The originator algorithm, not an originator creating algorithm.

The governments of the World gave us coronavirus lockdown. These are the same governments that conscript people for bullshit wars. These are the same governments that don't or won't do anything ever about the tech scammers that Pierogi aka scammerrevolts, Jim Browning, Trilogy Media, and Karl Rock go after. These are the same governments that give us legally enforced forced single perspective artificial narratives. These are the same governments we're talking about. 

Donald Trump said, "The was government that has the power to give you everything you have is also powerful enough to take everything you own away." Ergo, the government can be and often is an asshole.

The News is just the World seen through the eyes of a cliquey clique. 

There is no time and space. There are only states of quantum entanglement and superposition. Time and space would have a totally different meaning or else be irrelevant altogether when you can teleport while time traveling simultaneously as teleportation and time travel are not mutually exclusive.

Life isn't all rip offs. I met a lot of people that I'll always be glad that I've met. I wouldn't want to live my life over again, but that's not the point. The point is to learn lessons about existence from different experiences and to derive conclusions thereof that couldn't be obtained in any other way. Like digestion, if one are a less than standard meal because it was the only meal around at the time, one doesn't need to want to eat it again. Food is made of course matter in which digestion gets the nutrients. Life is coarse matter experiences from which we derive lessons and conclusions which form and mold the personality which lives on in the afterlife forever, surfing along a totally different time dynamic of eternity. 

Zen: First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is. When a person is really young all towns and countries seems the same. Then as one gets older, towns and countries get categorized in some kind of categorical imperative so some towns and countries are rock shows while other towns and countries are shit shows, some towns are regression while other towns are adventure. Then as one gets even older, all towns and countries are pretty much the same. What was once an escape is now a trap. All towns and countries if stayed in long enough become regression towns eventually, so what? All towns and countries have the same tow the local line agenda, forced artificial or not narratives about things, and heavy handed at necessary times governments. There is no one greatest best town or country in the world or everyone in the world would live there. All towns and countries in the world are more or less equally the greatest best town or country in the World. Don't listen to the sensationalist news. Most places in the world have friendly tolerant people. Thanks to the internet, no one lives in an intellectual or cultural bubble. Good ideas from every town and country are shared internationally. 

There is no right or wrong town to move to and one never has to think that they must move because they are living in the wrong town. The only wrong towns and countries I can think of objectively and empirically are places with an ongoing military conflict or else some stone age aboriginal village that practices cannibalism. I mean come on, get it together. But to think that even cannibal tribes is considered part of the human species makes me ashamed to be a human, to be pumped in with that ignomiously egregious lot.

I don't have to move to another town and country. This town is it. If I had money, however, I'd pretty much leave. To another town and country and never come back. Ever.  Adventure forever.  That's my ultimate ideal. 

Some jerkwater backwater shit hole bullshit infrastructure towns are to be avoided. Towns where you got to go to the next town an hour, two, three, four hours away to get a passport or to see a dentist are to be absolutely avoided. These towns are counterefficient to themselves let alone to tourists lol and this is a collective and not individuals I'm talking about.

Small tiny hamlet towns are all right. Advantages. Very slow pace of life. Cheap real estate. Disadvantages. Not much to do. 

I got Baby Yoda at Walmart. Saturday, April 24, 2021 for $50. Pricey, but it's a once in a lifetime purchase. This was on my way to getting a heater which wasn't available at London Drugs. Baby Yoda is 50 years old. I'm 50 years old!

I read a story on YouTube comments: paraphrased

"My mom was still upset years later about a slight made towards her in high school. She googled the person and found out she had died. She wasted a lot of years holding on to that."

I deleted my Bruce Lee Game of Death video. Too many unwanted comments which were all of them. But I'm the same guy who doesn't and wouldn't even spend a cent on advertising. I'm the same guy who usually doesn't go out at night. 

To me those comments are unwanted worthless garbage and whatever percent it is and it wouldn't be zero, there's some percent of a chance that it's probably bots anyway.

Lots of YouTube legends have dealt with and what's more know how to deal with strange comments such as Steve Huff and Jenna Marbles. I look up to them for that.

Some would say, "You fool! Those comments are good! YouTube 101 is any comments even negative is better than no comments at all. Those comments were seeding your video.  But you can't wrap your mind around this and accept it so you took the video down. You're still naive about this after all these years. Oh well. Nevermind."

But as I have often said, the goddamned fucking forces of my fucking life. I never thumbs down a video. Ever. So naturally on that Bruce Lee video alone, I had 35 thumbs down or dislikes. On another video, I had over 200,000 dislikes. Goddamned shit forces of life that's what it fucking returns to me. I wish I died of a heroin overdose at the Roosevelt Hotel in 1994. Seeing how my life has turned out since then. Fucking goddamned forces of life. I generate a kind of energy and get quite another and worse kind of energy in return. Time and time again. And it has the audacity to call itself life. Life implies an endeavour that is worthwhile. While this fucking 50 years and counting shitbag embroglio was not worth my fucking while. I'd like to quit life if I could at this point its all a joke. If I get married, it'd be a joke. If I don't get married it's also a joke.

I get offended or else irritated easily. Most of the passing offhand comments I hear on the street as people talk to one another register to me as either offsetting or annoying. I've read the chatroom conversatIon that's built in to a lot of apps. Come for the match 3. Stay for the spurious chatroom conversation. I just about never comment in these chats. I watch silently. I wouldn't know what to say and think that I would automatically be rejected so I never bother. Most people in these chatrooms are in their late teens to early thirties. I'm 50 years old and I think they can sense that. 

And Bruce Lee is a trending topic and Game of Death was a popular trending movie so that would attract the bots. But Bruce Lee is a topic that draws a certain demographic, the more surly in society. Hence the edgy comments. The straw that broke the camels back is someone today sent in the latest and last comment, since I took the video down. The comment was "What is this?" Which to me registered as surly. I don't need to be getting these worthless garbage comments on the regular now. So I took down the video.

I don't care at all about being famous on YouTube if it means getting strange nebulous comments all the time. I would take down all my YouTube videos before going through that. 

Bruce Lee wouldn't attract a demographic as surly as the World War 2 guy would, but he's just a few neighborhoods over when it comes to that.

But it's all about levels. Some YouTube stars get more mean comments in one day than I have in my entire 13 year YouTube career. Namely President Donald Trump. The comments come in like an avalanche for him. Did I say one day? I meant one hour! His Twitter used to get more strange comments in one hour than I have in my entire time on  YouTube. But he can handle it because he is smart. I found out on the app Facts and Myths that Donald Trump's IQ has the second highest of any President. Donald Trump's IQ is 158. John Quincy Adams IQ 165.

Donald Trump said, "Criticism is easier to take when you realize that the only people who haven't been criticised are those who don't take risks."

Even videos on YouTube about the Royals are not immune to the strange comments. Being on YouTube takes guts. Scared of getting comments prevented a lot of people from even starting on YouTube.

I don't think that I ever left any mean or edgy comments on anyone's YouTube video. So naturally in return for that the goddamned forces of life has given me some of the most weirdest and surly comments on my YouTube videos. Goddamned fucking forces of fucking life. I know where the blame lies. Behind the unwanted YouTube comments is the goddamned forces of life. I generate a certain kind of energy and return get another another fucking kind of energy.

The goddamned forces of my fucking life. I am a talented cartoonist. Most if not all who left weird unwanted garbage comments on my YouTube videos are untalented non cartoonists. Fucking goddamned forces of life always sets me up with these weird shit personalities. Goddamned forces of my goddamned life.

Sometimes a YouTube video or even a comment ie for eg '476 replies'. 

There is a story about someone's YouTube video that had a comment war that was epic. The comment war was longer than the Bible! YouTube has a video telling this story:  'Angriest Comment Thread On YouTube' from Penguinz0.   

Then the comments on this video said 'I'm surprised the person didn't take down the video sooner.' and that's just it. If you see comments accumulating, either take down the video or disable the comments. 

Stephen King said, "Bad luck follows bad luck like clouds condense around small particles." A comment war comprised of the typical dime-a-dozen YouTube comments is useless garbage. 'Why YouTube comments suck and Reddit doesn't' Apparently, Reddit comments are deemed as ones that are more highbrow than the lowbrow comments that YouTube can and often will deliver.

But a few mean comments really is better than no comments and I've seen accounts with less than ten subscribers and the few videos they upload of their family home movies have no comments at all or maybe one or two good comments. The goody goody two shoes accounts and it was probably their mother who left that comment. The videos with mean comments outrank the goody goody two shoes videos in terms of social media validity. Odd but somewhat true. The mean comments is like some kind of hazing ritual but that's only for those who value and appreciate that. I don't. A YouTube career, being famous on YouTube means nothing to me if I'm also have to get comments all the time.

I am like a Royal alien rock star from The Day The Earth Stood Still and the talentless peasants misunderstand or resent my talents so I generate a certain kind of energy. A kind of fumbling attempting to bring you down to my level kind of energy and so they blew it. I take down my video. If that's what I get in return for my gift then I withdraw my gift. Peons like you don't deserve it. 

A famous tactic on YouTube is revenge. Go to the channel which left the comment and attack their channel, videos etc. I wouldn't bother doing that. However I sometimes tell my friends about an upsetting YouTube comment I got and there's no guarantee they won't go after the comment poster's channel and attack their videos etc. If they did, they sure never tell me about it!

I quit my PCAD job. My client has taken a turn for the worse. She's been shitting the bed every day for four days in a row. Bailing her out. She didn't even have the money for the laundry. I had to use my laundry money. And I cleaned her sheets. The last day was like an avalanche. One entire corner of her quilt was just drenched in an awful brown liquid. 3 guesses what it is. 

That's a medical problem on another level. I could get dysentery or toxoplasmosis from that. That day, she said she would try to get used to the smell. Retardation or what?! I immediately insisted that I clean for her as the smell affected her neighbours too. 

Bailing her out! Bailing her out! Bailing her out! I'm always having to fucking bail her out!

That's it. It's over. Things weren't difficult enough. It had to be even more difficult. As you know, when it comes to being an asshole, the forces of life always find a way. 

For me to go on helping her would be counterproductive. The nurses need to see just exactly the extent of her condition. Me being there and helping her all the time would mask that. In the ant nest of the medical world or medical hierarchy, a nurse ranks higher than a PCAD. 

I even suggested wearing adult diapers and this was after the first time. She second guessed and side swiped me out of retardation and she said she didn't need that. Then she shits herself for the following three days in a row. 

What an energy draining experience. Then I had to shower her and clean her floor, for all those four days in a row.

Every day yet another frisson of retardation. Walking around, coasting along normally, then another weird crazy clumsy retarded surprise. Time and time again with her.

I'm out! 

I can't take a chance of that happening again. Too much! Lost cause! 

If she didn't have all these nurses visiting her daily and I stopped working for her, that would be an assshole move. As it is if I keep working for her at this point it would be an asshole move because it would prevent or compromise the nurses from doing their job.

I was at a Vietnamese restaurant outdoors on the patio. Eating rice noodles outdoors very much reminded me of Thailand. Intensely so. Gin kwa tiew, yen da foe. Anyways as I was eating an old couple just stopped and stared while I was eating and the old lady was saying something. Their energy seemed off. I sensed they were German. I thought nothing of it at the time but later, I got mad. What did the old lady say exactly? Some crazy racist shit perhaps. I never get offended at this because I don't think that I represent Asian people. I'm not their standard bearer. I don't speak for all of them so why should I represent all of them? 

What can you do? They were gone a second later. I wouldn't stand up and say fuck off because I respect the elderly. They spent a lot of years working and doing respectable things for the community or country for decades etc. 

Since they were German, I'm wondering if I should have said with my rudimentary understanding of German, Warum sieht dein gesicht aus wie eine schildkrote? In other words, why does your face look like a turtle but they were old! They were gone a second later! I had my headphones on the entire time and they could have said something like, "It's a good restaurant. I've eaten here for years. I know the owner. I recommended the braised pork legs." Or something similar to that. I don't know. 

I talked to someone about this and they said, "It's the pandemic. A lot of old people are stir crazy. They're walking outside for the first time in months and they stare at people.

I hate this town. I get it from both ends. One time I was walking and someone sitting outdoors in a restaurant yelled something verbally abusive to me. And so this time while I'm sitting outdoors in a restaurant, someone talks to me. Now I never talk to people either when I'm sitting at an outdoor restaurant nor when I'm walking past one. So naturally I get this. What a fucking town! Or is it the goddamned forces of life at play here once again painting me into a goddamned corner. Fucking goddamned forces of life, I tell you. You generate a certain kind of energy and get quite another and worse kind in return. Time and time again.

I wouldn't leave this town as I would like to stay with Heather forever.

I can't work as a PCAD anymore. It's burning me out. I don't want to do it. I want my life back. I'm quitting. All it ever is is work work work. 

It's not just the past seven months. I've been working for her for years. No, all that work isn't enough. It has to be more. She could sit there and watch me work and not ever say, "Hey, you worked for me long enough. I couldn't in good conscience sit here and watch you work for me. This is my responsibility anyways. I won't take advantage of your kindness. I would say that to anyone in that situation." I told her this and then as a test asked her, do you need me to do this and this and this and that for you? "Sure!" What retard! If you offer, she take and take and take and take. There's no end to it. 

I'm leaving her today. She's not my responsibility. I'm not legally required to take care of her.

I'm not even legally required to take care of my own child. Anyone, anytime they feel they can't take on the added burden responsibility and hassle of raising a child can at any time turn the child over to a Catholic adoption agency, social services and if available, a kibbutz. 

If I'm not even legally required to raise my own child if I had one and if I didn't want to, I'm certainly not legally required to take care of a retarded cripple. No, I haven't been doing it for long enough it has to be longer. Fuck up yet another day of mine. Uh, no thanks. 

Even the President of the United States isn't legally required to go on being the President if he doesn't want to. All he has to do is say, "I can't handle this any more. Too many assholes online criticizing me. I hate mean comments. Therefore I'm using my legal right to invoke the 25th Amendment and have the VP take over."

When someone abuses you and expects you to always clean up their mess, that's "failing upwards" and such people are dangerous. To others and to themselves. I learned this from YouTube.

I still love this lady whom I have at times referred to as my PCAD client ad at times as my girlfriend. I still help her and do some work for her but not as much as I used to. 

What was with that old couple talking to me while I was eating? That's the goddamned forces of life. Generate a kind of energy. Get another kind in return. But that happened to me in Thailand a few times. Outdoors eating, and someone pokes their face in right when you're eating and starts talking to me. What a shit town. 

I want to quit life altogether. I know of a lot of people who had shitty lives but they died young. God gave them an early reprieve, it seems. I wish God could give me an early reprieve. Life is a rip off.

That old couple. It was weird. First the old guy kind of smiled at me. Then the old lady was talking but she was sharply pointing a finger sharply and although I had my headphones on, she said something I heard as "Cambodia" but it was probably corona. She probably said, "It was you Asians who caused the corona." That was awful. That's Canada. Walking around, coasting along normally, all of a sudden unpleasant surprise.

But even in telling this story, there's a chance that people know who that old couple is. I heard a story about someone who was using the dark net which automatically and presumably uses a VPN and the person was using an alias. He said he had to go on a break. He went to a restaurant. When he went back, someone told him the name of the restaurant he went to, what he ordered and where he sat. It's called hidden tech. It's that next level. What a creepy town. All towns are creepy towns and any expat will tell that every town they went to, they encountered some weird, crazy people.